Self sabotage… do you do it? Sometimes we push a part of ourselves away. A part we do not like so much. A part that makes us feel shame, guilt, failure or rejection.
We think if we push it away, life will be easier… but did you know you need that part in order to be whole and alive?
How do you sabotage yourself? How do you sabotage your happiness, love and life?
You see, you have a belief about yourself. Do you like it? Is it a good one? Are you confident in who you are?
If you don’t believe in you, how can the world around you love you back? You cant ask the world to fill a hole that you will not face yourself.
If you don’t love yourself whole and complete from the inside out first – you will do you best everyday to unconsciously cut yourself down.
Maybe you dont let love in because you feel unlovable.
We all have our shit, that is totally okay. It is normal. Pushing it away won’t fix it. I will teach you how to love it all…
Maybe its time to shine a light into the shadows… And you don’t have to do it alone…
It’s okay to admit that your relationship is not okay… It’s better than sweeping it under the mat, walking on eggs shells and smiling at the world when inside you are hurting.
First… admit it to yourself. Next… admit it to one another. Then… let a couple of close friends in. Realise its a normal & healthy part of long term love.
Awareness. Acceptance. Communication.
Most people are terrified at the opportunity to bring it out into the light, so you actually get to make it better.
Scared you cant do it? Scared it won’t last? Worried what people will think? Worried you will hurt one another?
Is it any worse that what you are suffering in silence right now? Why not talk about it… and begin the journey to make it everything you actually want it to be… for real.
If you are feeling it… so is your lover. So talk about it.
When I work with couples… I coach you to actually speak deeply with one another… and the relief you each get from letting out all the pain and worry… all the stuff you have been holding onto… it creates a wedge that keeps you separated… so once thats all out in the open you get to actually begin again to chat, hang out and reconnect.
Nervous system health…
Nervous system health is paramount to our capacity to enjoy life overall.
When our nervous system is overloaded our brain won’t work, your heart is cold, your gut tight, you feel energically weak and tired, you won’t like to be touched, and you will experience physical pain and tension in the system. The tension will express itself in outbursts of emotion, highs and lows, illness, depression or anxiety.
Its a LOT right! So its important to know a bit about this! Nervous system health is vital to enjoy life, experience pleasure, and experience yourself as a playful, loving, powerful, wise human. Otherwise what are you doing with your life?
Its more than just that schedule. Its more than the things you think you have to do and achieve. Its far more than ticking all the boxes so that ‘one day’ life miraculously comes good… Are you still waiting?
Are you taking good care of your human?
To begin…. right now… breath into your belly. Is your system locked and tight / or are you able to create a moving belly breath)? Notice the state you are in. What do you notice? Are you soft or tense? Are you overthinking or mindful? Are you racy or in flow? Where is the tension?
Over the next few days… I invite you to bring greater self-awareness to the inner state of your being. Sounds a bit woo woo… But if you can really get this… it IS everything…
Are you living deeply inside of yourself or ‘out there’ somewhere too busy to notice yourself?
This BIG massive tree is like what it looks like to live deeply inside of yourself… whole, complete, grounded, expansive, strong, wise, flowing and confident… Here is me… deep inside of me and my life experience… Its my job to take good care of myself and create the life I want for me.
Relationship coaching for men…
Men have a real fear around ‘what to do’ when their woman opens up and or gets really emotional. It scares the heck out of them… so it means a man can shut down, run away and not feel confident enough to be able to stay present in that space.
Today Im working with male clients who are learning the secrets of how stay present with all emotions and when your woman needs you the most. And tips for clear communication so the conversation doesn’t loose track or become overwhelming. Also how to stay present in the body and not have to shut down or run away when the going gets tough.
I liken it to the resources needed for a big ship to be able to drop anchor and weather the storm.
Big shout out to the brave, strong, wise, present men who come to relationship coaching open to growth and deeper connections.
None of us are born with all the tools needed to navigate relationships and life, but we can be open to learning together along the way…
Relating in grown up love takes vulnerability and curiosity towards connected long lasting love and intimacy.
It’s okay to be different. We are all made that way for a reason. Do love your way…
How do you do stress?
How does your physical body respond to stress? I have been observing this in myself the past week.
When I am super stressed (and its happened a couple of times this year) my physical body shuts down in layers. My childhood pattern of behaviour (we all have one) was to shut down, hide, go silent, cold and numb out when I was scared or stressed.
This week I have observed first my mind was stressed – going over the story that triggered the stress and worry. This lasted for three days. Then it effected my physical body… I became really lethargic, heavy and cold.
I went quiet. I didnt want to be touched. Everything felt hard. My surrounds lost their spark and joy.
So I really just allowed those feelings and uncomfortable sensations to move through my body… without having to change anything… or ‘try’ make it go away… or distract myself. Actually I didnt have the energy anyway.
Then it came to me.
I can not tolerate stress and physical tension in my nervous system. I dont want to do things that make me feel stressed, anxious or worried. Now I know there is a better way. I just dont want to do it that way anymore.
How does your body respond to stress? Have you observed the two polarities in yourself lately?
Flow vs tension.
Awareness leads to choice leads to change.
Next time you are stressed, observe the impact it has on your system. Your head, heart and gut. Allow yourself to feel each layer as it moves. In time… this naturally transmutes into more information that allows you to make better choices next time.
If you get stuck, PM to book in. Lets talk. I’ll teach you how to feel and move your emotions, and how to create positive change.
It begins within… are you ready?
I tell my clients ‘over medicate, use it as much as you can, often, daily and especially in stressful times’…
The tools for change I teach you are rapid and transformative. So long as you use them, and put them to good use.
Ohhh yes so go ahead and overmedicate on the good and natural things you need more of in your life such as self awareness, self-care, more spaciousness, more balance, more stillness, more joy, move love, more connection…
With a client yesterday I told him ‘what you need is less, not more’… (less on the outside and more on the inside)
You see he is already a master of the mind, already amazing. When you look at him from the outside you would think he has a great life… so you might wonder what’s he doing having anxiety and coming to personal coaching?
Good question. I asked him that too.
Everything is good for him on the outside. But on the inside he is numb and he says life feels ‘mundane’.
So I taught him the basics of embodiment, breath, feeling, nervous system health. It confused his brain that is used to being ‘in control’ and doing good, working hard, seeking approval. The typical response when you’re and over thinker.
Then he realised he actually wants to be more easy going, wants more joy and a loving lasting relationship.
He has begun the journey to fill himself up from the inside out so he can relax in his body and feel more.
This is where life starts to get good from the inside out.
Life as it comes…
I know it’s hard to hear. We cant hear it when the wounds are still too fresh, but we are able to hear it much after the event.
‘Life happens to for us, not to us’. Is it the right time for you to reflect on this now?
If you feel life is hard you may still be stuck in your victim story, and not received your gifts and power from those events.
Do you feel stuck or are you thriving? That’s the question it reflect on this week.
The life events that happened along the way… what did they teach you about yourself? How did they support you to become the person you are today?
Here in these rapidly changing times we are being asked more than ever before to let go of own personal stories, transcend them, step up and shine more love into the world. But you can only do this once you have healed and released your traumas.
If you still feel stuck, put your hands on your body, close your eyes and ask your inner self right now… What are you are still waiting for? What do you need so that you can release yourself from the past?
I know its hard to hear if you are still ‘waiting’ for something… What if you are the one you have been waiting for. How long will you keep yourself waiting? So go on and give yourself the thing you have been waiting for all this time. No more waiting. Because life is too short to get stuck in low vibration stories, events, relationships and old wounds.
We are all needed right now. 2020 is asking us to shed our dense skins of the past and rise up into the new one world for unity. It’s now or never.
Curious Minds Open Hearts Shining Souls
And don’t trick yourself into bypassing what needs to be done. You need to actually feel your inner wounds… let yourself feel it. Don’t leave your body or numb out. You are here to take the human experience in the body. That is why you are here. To embrace your experiences and shine.
Step into the power and gifts your stories came to deliver. And now get on with your bigger mission.
Embody your Superpowers!
When you are stepping into your superpowers, the world will come and test you. When you are healing yourself, your soul will come and test you.
Because your soul is checking if you are serious about stepping up. Serious about being a better you. It’s easy to numb out, withdraw and be a half version of you. It takes courage to shed, grow and heal.
It takes a lot of strength and bravery to get real & feel life.
Maybe you are learning to speak up and take better care of yourself. And so, a test will come. An experience will present itself to check if you are serious about that. An opportunity to test out your new-found way of being…. inviting you to ‘speak up’.
Maybe you are learning to be more present, not to withdraw when challenged. A test will present itself. An opportunity where you are challenged the very next day after your session. Asking you to ‘be present’…. to stay in your body and ‘feel it’.
Maybe you are learning to use your intuition, and not to get hooked into external gossip. And so, a test will arrive. Inviting you to test staying inward and ‘trust in your own wisdom’…
Maybe you are learning to trust that you are enough, that you are worthy. A test will come to see if you are serious about taking up more space in the world and ‘be seen’.
That means you might feel confused, disrupted, challenged or uncomfortable. That’s okay. You are being invited to test out your new skin and step up into the new better version of you.
When pain and challenge come… stay in your body, let yourself feel it… practice your new-found skills and beliefs… and see what happens next. It new territory.
Go within, Breathe… feel… connect… The ultimate test is to remember Y O U have everything you need inside…
Time to drop in and use it more.
Even at times if it’s uncomfortable, it is a vital part of the process of going through the birth canal to birth the new you.
In changing times…
We are in between two worlds right now.
The old and the new. Not completely released. Not quite rebirthed from the ashes. It’s ok for it to feel turbulent.
Hold yourself from the inside. Love, compassion and protection as your little self surrenders to letting go so the new can begin to arrive. How can you be the leader you have been looking for? That time has now arrived.
Embodied. Through the senses. Lead empowered and deliberately. Remember anytime you feel stressed or overwhelmed to breathe into your belly. Invite your body to soften. And breathe into your heart. We are all needed right now. Everyone plays a vital part of our evolution. Set high standards of integrity for yourself. How will you direct your power source from within? Be the one you have been waiting for. If we each do that imagine what is to come next.
Raw Creator energy is pouring in. How will you use it?
Recognise when you are triggered on the outside and zoom off into chaos or fear.
Your true courage, power, composure and wisdom is all there on the inside.
It’s time to lay down your weapons and go home, to you.
The 2020 unravelling…
Today is a good day to count your blessings.
What are you grateful for?
Take a look back over the months you have travelled in 2020 so far… what have been your ups and your downs?
What lessons have you learnt?
What changes have you made to the way you do life?
What are you grateful for?
Get out your journal and write a letter to yourself.
What you have learnt, released, and gained.
How does all of this support you to sustain yourself for the remainder of the year?
(embody your lessons to lift yourself higher).
At anytime you are feeling overwhelmed, go within.Be the leader you are looking for.
That time is now.
Cry yourself to heal…
Crying is so healing…
Often when tears want to come the time and the space might prevent you from letting them flow. It is a healing practice that whenever you are alone and tears want to come, you allow them to flow freely.
Soften your body and face. Soften into your belly and heart. Soften all the places you have been holding on.
Without changing a thing… without having to analyse ‘why’ the tears. Tears have their own intelligence. They know the way to heal.
Tears falling down your face, without wiping them away release stress, body tension, release the monkey mind and invite emotional connection. Letting go of control and doing. Creating space for your body, mind and soul to release and reset.
Today I set up to go into a guided meditation. Yesterday I noticed by body was really tense and I didn’t sleep well. Aka ‘stress’ was present in my body, mind and soul. So I woke up today thinking I’m going to do some breath work on myself and a meditation for a bit of a reset before working today. The meditation jammed and stopped working, so I just sat quietly with myself and started crying.
That’s actually what I needed.
Just to be completely still, alone, quiet, and cry… I could feel my body softening… the tension releasing…. The stresses of yesterday falling down my face tear by tear.
It was a beautiful reminder in the simplicity and healing power of tears.
Death is precious…
Death is a precious time.
If we honoured it with as much gusto as we put into our daily lives we would not be so scared of dying.
Death is a sacred path. As sacred as the journey of life. We only get one go at each. Embracing the cycle of life and loss. Holding the whole journey of life that is equally light and dark. Equally magical and mysteriously troublesome. People often say something special happens at only weddings and funerals. We see people coming together. We feel raw emotions. We see laughing and crying. People hug that usually don’t make the time to get together. People pause from the hum drum of life to travel to celebrate life and connect. We have moments of remembering we are one little tribe and community.
I was chatting to a young woman after a funeral I went to today. She said three more of her class friends went on antidepressants recently. She says ‘it seems the pretty normal way of dealing with things these days’. And I reflect again on death, pain, grief and loss. Creating the necessary space and time to feel raw emotions of life that is absolutely necessary to mental health and wellbeing. Having the capacity to feel and not bypass the perceived shit stuff that happens in life. Divorce of your parents, death of a loved one, break up with a lover, loss of your job, social pressures, change of life circumstances, failure and rejection. We have to be taught how to feel these life events or they get stuck in the emotional body only to fester and create more pain. We cannot block the realness of life.
If I asked you to make a list of all the precious fun things about life it would be reasonably simple… But if I asked you to write of list of all the precious joy filled things about death, grief and loss, could you do it?
Let me share a few… time and space changes, the world moves slower, shock causes your system to slow down and your senses heighten, so you notice more of the little things that you had not seen before. Tears become your healing guide, teaching you the way to mend the broken pieces. You notice more love and connection in the world through the tenderness of those around you, and therefore you feel more emotion than you may have experienced before. You reflect more intensely and deeply on the meaning of life and therefore awaken to new possibilities with more clarity as a new you beautifully emerges over time.
Death is an essential Rite of Passage.
So it’s a clear invitation to not dodge the hard subjects, just go for it with as much commitment to the so called easier ones. Loss is important too. Disappointment, frustration and regret all vital teachings in the School of Life. If we honoured all of this with as much gusto as we put into the ‘good’ parts of life, there would be so much less suffering in the world and more honouring of the whole and complete innate Cycle of Life.
Allow your pain to be experienced. Give it all the space it commands to be felt. Then you can naturally move on having embodied the learning from that experience. I used to be scared of death. I also used to be scared of pain, darkness and being wrong. But I guess it’s easy to reflect back and see that how far I have come. I am now able to equally hold space for the light and dark in my life. I allow equal time and space in my day to day life to cry and laugh. It’s one of my Superpowers. And that is why it is necessary for the older wiser ones to hold space for the younger ones, or those who have not experienced darkness or pain before. Or the ones who have not been through death of a loved one before. It’s a holy baton of understanding and compassion that gets passed into your hands, imprints and passed on. Honouring the Cycle of Life. Remember in any troubled times, we are all in this together. We are just little shards of the one whole.
Don’t leave any of your parts unloved, undernourished and unattended.
Go and love all the little parts of you out there in the world.
Hold the baton when you have it.
Ask for it when you need it. Just don’t do it alone.
How to begin again…
Whenever you feel overwhelmed or stressed the first thing I recommend is to simplify your life.
Strip it back to the basics. Create immediate space anyway and everywhere you can.
You need time just to be… to exhale, to soften, to let go… that’s the best way to begin again.
Lets talk about anxiety…
Lets talk about ‘anxiety’… and what I notice in myself and what I see in my clients…
Anxiety… firstly its a word created to describe a feeling or a state taking place in the body. So my first suggestion is to drop the word and go into the feeling – what are you experiencing?
How does it uniquely show up in your body? The state that you label ‘anxiety’. Get up close and personal and feel it. Witness it as it moves and does it thing. As its not you, its something that is moving through your body, wanting your attention.
So if its wants your attention ask it… why are you showing me this, why am I feeling like this. Make a little enquiry. See what you find. Remember dont label yourself as having ‘anxiety’… just explore the feeling each time it comes, feel, ask and listen.
Secondly… ‘anxiety’ is a state of the upper realms. It happens in the upper part of your body, mind and soul. It happens when you are too busy in your head, overthinking, too busy in life in general and not grounded.
I tell you who doesn’t suffer ‘anxiety’ is the big ancient trees in the forest.. so lets for a moment channel their wisdom.
When we become deeply rooted in ourselves, our voice, our purpose, our place in the world… those feeling of stress, worry, fear subside… Interesting.
So once again (I have said it before) what is anxiety is asking you to wake up? Its a message, its fear and stuck emotion trapped in your body asking for your attention. And it will keep rattling you until you spot, surrender and listen.
What I notice in myself particularly this year, when I am not grounded, too much in my head, I was experiencing chest tightening, heart flutter, panic, fear… all things I could label as anxiety… but I know it for what it was. It was shaking me and asking me to wake up and listen, to slow down, come back to my truth, my inner power source, and root myself back into the forest. Which I did. I came back home to myself and found peace again…
So next time you notice these feelings moving through you, stop, feel and listen… create some space to drop into what it is offering you. It might seem a bit scary, however when you go towards it the gifts will be great.
This is what I do with my clients too, I professionally guide you, teach you how to be in your body, to feel, to listen to you inner wisdom and create a contented purposeful life.
Once you know the way, it’s a skill you will use for life.
Hearts Wide Open //
If you want to live a more connected happy awesome life. You have got to make friends with your feelings.
All of them.
When my heart cracked open the first thing I felt was pain. It wasn’t pretty.
Years of blocked pain and anger erupted to the surface like hot lava.
I would have physical pain radiating down my arms. I have even had a nerve virus twice through having a blocked emotional life force. Years if self sabotage and numbing out.
Yep holding onto all that ridged control made me sick.
Luckily, my very wise soul knew I had to journey through the tunnel of pain to reach the pot of gold. To feel more goodness.
Often I wondered is this ever going to be done. Am I healed yet.
Now I know it’s the wonderful ongoing journey of me. The journey of growing up. Becoming wise.
When your heart opens, feeling doesn’t end. Its never done. It’s something I navigate daily.
It’s just the beginning to a wonderful new way of life.
Feeling all of me.
I know it might seem scary. But when you have an experienced wise mentor to coach you through your emotional freedom is right there waiting.
I will powerfully guide you to feel and embody your true self.
All of you. Is she awake? The part that’s wants to be wild and free…
The biggest mistake couples make //
They often come in close to the end. When they have tried to work it out on their own and can’t get unstuck. They pluck up the courage and book in.
‘What have we got to lose’.
I listen to the story. It’s common. But they tell it in a way like it’s a big secret.
A heart full of emotions pile out. She cry’s saying he doesn’t get it. He says he has already tried ‘everything’ to make her happy.
Both, fell victim to the most common mistake //
Real communication. For better and for worse. Time now to turn and face one another again.
‘Have you asked for what you need’? I enquire, ‘have you really talked it through, shared deeply, what’s working, what’s not working, what you need’?
I know it’s hard to be vulnerable with the one you love. You are in the right place. I will guide you both into a deep process for heart opening, sharing and reconnection.
She softens. He is relieved.
I go through my couples ‘cheatsheet’. They have a little giggle and talk quietly together.
By the end of the session they embrace. She is crying. Happy for being really heard and understood. He says ‘why didn’t you just tell me, I could have been that for you years ago’.
Men are not mind readers. They like us to keep it simple and direct so they can meet our needs. (And ask him what he really needs too).
They love to love us in the way we want it. They love to make us happy. We all love to be loved. And held.
If you can’t have these kind of deep reconnecting conversations ask me. Clear the way for a new grown up love. Not something that you have outgrown and not working.
I can guide you both.
Couples works is done individually and as couples. You do both sessions. Some for you and then some as a couple.
The second biggest mistake couples make is pretending you are the only ones who are struggling. We all struggle. Its part of the process of love.
Keep growing with your love.
Lovers don’t always have to get on //
In fact polarising keeps life spicy and interesting. Opposites attract.
We see things in one another we want to cultivate in ourselves.
We sacrifice things for one another because we are in partnership.
And we choose to walk our path as a couple. In preference to being alone.
Give and take. Push and pull. Control and surrender. Hold and release.
I hear couples put down their partner. No one is perfect. Don’t play that game. Feeding into your partner not being perfect.
Just be wild acceptance. Genuinely connected. Committed to growing old together.
I do believe work it out with the one you are with. That is the lesson. Otherwise you will repeat the same with the next.
Until you get it.
What’s the lesson being awakened in you right now?
Mine is acceptance. Go with the flow. Joy in the stillness.
Making the most of being human in 2020
We attract situations that bring our wounds to the surface to heal. To take us where we need to go next.
We take lovers to do our inner work and journey with.
We are here to do the work. To take the journey as wild.earth walkers. Feeling our way in our primal body. Grounded spirituality.
The very thing you are attracting right now is it. What is coming for you in 2020?
It has begun.
We create our challenges. Pain pushes us to grow, wake up and transform.
We jobs were take. We people we meet. The things we do. The places we go. The choices we make.
What do you want? What do you need?
See it. Name it. Feel it. Be with it Surrender to it.
The very thing you are attracting is your medicine.
If you can really be with this, you are really growing. Two feet in 2020.
If you get stuck in a loop and keep cycling the same experience you can reach out.
Im here to break that cycle. Smash the hamster wheel.
To hold you in the shadow to alchemise the wound. To level you up in the new paradigm.
Trust in the call.
I see you.
A simple shortcut for connected couples //
🔥Name what you want.
There, I said it.
Otherwise it goes down like this…
She is lonely, sad and longing for more. Touch. Real touch. To be noticed. She’s cold and vacant. She bangs the cupboards loudly wanting him to get it. He’s working hard. So hard providing. He longs for some appreciation. To deeply feel loving acknowledgement in his bones. He is tired. Worried. He takes off to his shed and works more. She’s thinking. I just want you to hold me and tell me you love me and that everything is going to be ok. He is thinking why can’t you just see me. Touch me. Put me higher up on that list of yours. Why do we leave it all left unsaid? She is worried how much longer she can carry on. She is drying up inside. He is keeping busy to avoid the situation as he can’t see the way to fix it. He is drifting away. 🔥Ask for what you want dear ones. I need you to hold me I’m lonely. I need you to touch me more. I need you to see me. I need you to be with me right now. I need you to sit with me for while. Just name it. Saves a lot of drama and disconnect. Each time you do this in a clear and simple way it brings you back a little closer again.
What healing will gift you (and what it wont) And how to relax into who you are //
Immersing in personal development has many gifts seen and unseen. Going to retreats or having a session with a healer will change you. But not in the way you might think.
You might hear phrases like ‘life changing’… ‘personal awakening’ and ‘transformational journey’ in testimonials. All these refer to the cleansing, opening and discovery of yourself.
However, it doesn’t turn you into someone else. What you do is find your true self. When we are born, we come with our blue print. The pain we suffer is from mud flicked onto that blueprint along the way. And we don’t have the tools to clear them off by yourself.
The wide science of all the healing arts supports you to surrender into a unique magnificent creature that you already are. You came with everything that you already need. You already have magic star dust in your bones.
A lot of what effective healers actually do is stripping away the stored baggage you have collected and unlearning things that aren’t actually true or working for you. Decluttering your human self.
A lot of the pain we suffer is thinking we are broken or wrong. Or that we are meant to be someone else better. Or in childhood we suffered and still carry some unfelt wounds. Or we weren’t taught how to feel all of our emotions. We weren’t taught self-care and self-responsibility.
I felt broken for a decade in my younger years and was busy trying to ‘fix’ myself. Instead, I was just in lots of pain and did not have the emotional intelligence to feel and heal by myself.
So what healing does gift you is to strip away the junk so you can see, feel and hear yourself more clearly.
What happens next?
Life flows more easily. You are able to love the people around you with an open heart. You are able to hold yourself steady when challenged. You will be more relaxed and easy going. You will live in your body and have more sensory awareness. You will be a better parent. You will be a better lover. You will be a better human. Step up in the world and shine your light bright. (the world needs us all now more than ever before).
You have the inner spaciousness to go for the things that bring you joy. You have the energy and clarity to gift the world your unique gifts. The stuff you have that the world needs.
Because you have found and relaxed into your true self. The person you were born to be. Without the armour of protection and emotional clutter taking up space.
How can we expect to be a great lover when we are self-loathing? How can we expect to be a relaxed parent when we are full of anger? How can we expect to feel the joy of each day when our hearts are numb? How can we expect to embrace the day when we are feeling overwhelmed?
I tell you what healing has directly gifted me. I have simplified my life. I actually like myself. I can relax into the woman I am and be her. I am still me. She was always there. I still have the same unique personality and wild.earth spirit. There was a lot to strip away to find her waiting there for me.
And now, I am able to step both feet into my life, into my purpose to make the most of it all. To do what I am here to do. And to live feeling spacious and abundant rather than just getting by and surviving. Embracing the human experience.
The “what I do” series…
Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP):
Is a large body of cognitive based work focussed on the science and processes of the thinking mind. It’s a fascinating study of human behaviour on how we process and store information. NLP is thought and behaviours based. NLP looks at how we create belief systems and internal maps from our experiences growing up. As a skilled NLP Practitioner, I carefully bring awareness around these old patterns that no longer serve. This creates fresh space to live life in the now. I use guided techniques and conversational hypnosis to explore your thinking and together we update your programming. NLP also offers a range of very practical tools to explore goal setting, action planning, living with passion, alignment, purpose and integrity. NLP tools also support you to create a better work life balance and become a better leader. It’s a great all-rounder personal development modality and focused on results. NLP also takes a look at the way we use language to create a more positive life experience. We also create greater awareness with the mind-body connections.
I was first introduced to NLP in 2008 when I went through my own healing crisis when my Dad was killed in a truck crash. My world fell apart. NLP gave me the foundational tools I needed to understand my thoughts and what I was going through. I had to rebuild my life and rebirth myself in a new grown up way. This then set me on my path in becoming a coach to help others in crisis, and those who generally want a better day to day life.
Family Systemic & Generational NLP3:
Generational healing is founded on the knowledge that we can carry baggage from previous generations that might hold us back in this life time. Ever get the sense that somethings feels bigger than you? Through guided meditation I support you to journey back in time to clear emotional weight you have carried from your past, such as anger, guilt and shame. This process can be the gateway to healing stuck challenges in your family line, and big emotions you feel are heavy and weigh you down. Healing these stuck parts creates space for new love, compassion and understanding. This work allows you to have more harmonious relationships with your immediate and extended family members. It also supports us to relate more harmoniously with people in general through more human understanding. We each learn we can take more responsibly for our lives and cast less blame on others, like our parents. This gives us more personal power and shared love for one another. We are all affected by the past, the environment we live in and the quantum field humanity belongs to.
I was taught family systemics by my NLP Master Teacher Wilbert from The Netherlands. This body of work allowed me to heal negative generational patterns passed along in my own family line. As well as cultivate more appreciation for the journey my parents and grandparents took and for how I was raised.
Time-Line Therapy & Conversational Hypnosis:
This is a specialised regression process where I thoughtfully guided you to walk back in time year by year. You are guided to move back into the formative years feeling into your past, making discoveries and the chance to clear out old wounds. You can locate the origin of a ‘feeling’, that holds you back from living the life you desire to in the now. You are not required to re-live the whole ‘story’, just the chance to take a fresh look at your personal history! We focus more on healing the emotional baggage to create fresh space in the now. Time-Line Therapy is used to remap negative emotions. Conversational Hypnosis is using voice, words and tone in a specific way to guide and relax the thinking brain, smoothing the mind and body to support you into a place of surrender and into a mild state of trance. This allows you to drop deeper into your unconscious to make discoveries and changes. I actually use conversational hypnosis in most of the guided processes, where I ask you to close your eyes, bring awareness to your breath and body and then I take you on an internal journey to meet your true self. Everyone’s experience of Time-Line Therapy is different, as our lives are all unique. You can use it as an opportunity to learn more about your past, behaviours, programming, and the origin of feelings you experience today. I love this process. Its’ always a mystery as to what unfolds and where the most significant discoveries will be found back in time!
Multi Brain Intelligences (mBIT):
Our body processes and stores memory and wisdom in more than just our brain. mBIT is based on exciting discoveries in Neuro Science that the human body has intelligent cells in the head, heart and gut (and more!). It’s not woo woo, its science! Our head is for thinking (logical processing), our heart is for emotions (authentic connection), our gut is for truth (healthy power). How much of your true self are you accessing?
As an example, it’s become more common knowledge that good health and wellness begins in the gut. And we can manifest physical pain and illness by holding onto emotional wounds. The guided mBIT process allows you to explore and clear old wounds in your cells. I guide to into your body to communicate with the innate intelligence of your brain, heart and digestive system. You may intuitively uncover areas of darkness, sickness, old baggage and old wounding, and gather new information for healing and growth. This creates fresh space for the way you want to live your life now, and so ‘every little cell in your body is well and happy’. How happy is your heart and gut? How overthinking is your brain? This is great for those who get a feeling that something is not right, you experience internal conflict and can’t make congruent decisions. Through the mBIT process we realign the head, heart and gut to reconnect and communicate as one. This also invokes more alive and flowing states of creativity, compassion and courage. The mBIT body of work was created by Behavioural Science Expert Grant Soosalu (he’s a super clever guy).
In one of my early sessions in mBIT I discovered why it was hard for me to really connect to people on a heart to heart level. It was because I felt unsafe in the world and didn’t trust ‘people’. So my coach rewired ‘trust’ in my base and it brought greater awareness in how I could cultivate more authentic relationships with people I loved. And also supported me to heal patterns from my past and trust people more. Communicating with the innate intelligence found in our whole body is a great way to gain clarity and wisdom.
Heart Touch is the leading Emotional Health Care System for Body Workers. It is a technique used to de-armour and drop into the emotional body. It involves guided touch, a full body breath wave, and gentle sounding to create an open baseline in your body. The body will show us any emotional blocks such as closed heart, feeling numb, unworthy, not enough, too controlling or loss of power (as an example). We rewire these so that you can live more fully alive and connected. Heart Touch works with the quadrants of fight / freeze and flight / friending to bring darkness into the light. This breath sequence can also expose the root cause of your emotional imprint from childhood. What messages did you feel, hear and see growing up? I look for places where you tend to close up and the places that require more flow and ease. Imagine what it might feel like to live fully in the here and now, connected and alive to your emotions and be okay with all of your feelings. We take a look into how your mind communicates with your body, looks for states of emotional distress, and how this might influence your decisions and behaviours. Heart Touch can also uncover your emotional truths and bring clarity to any stuck situation, such as in your relationships to feel you are enough, held, heard, seen, loved and trusted. Heart Touch brings emotional awareness, healing, wisdom, rebalancing and growth. Heart Touch is a powerful modality for individuals and couples.
Personally, I have been immersing in Heart Touch sessions for myself and my husband for the past couple of years with my mentor and teacher Dr Simon Martin. Directly because of these profound sessions, we have deepened our loving connection, and worked through blocks to bring us closer and reignited more fun and passion into our marriage. I recently became a Heart Touch Practitioner and I am now blending this bodywork sequence into my sessions. My clients are loving it. Heart Touch also clears the way to awaken your Kundalini Life Force. I am a practicing student of Kundalini Tantra.
What else is in the Mary Poppins Bag of Tricks:
There are a range of other magical tools in my diverse coaching kit: It takes a wide range of skills, experience and wisdom to support the whole person towards a state of balance.
These bodies of work have been simply transformative what it they have given to me in my own life as a woman.
Archetypal exploration allows us to playfully uncover what we hold in the shadow. Parts we have pushed away, shut down and hold in fear. In doing this we lose parts that we actually need to be whole! As an example, if we push away anger thinking it’s ‘bad’, we lose our power and ability to have safe boundaries. If we push away joy and playfulness because we have been told we need to be more ‘serious’ now, life will become mundane, dull and lifeless. If we push away sensuality we might notice our body feels little pleasure and we numb out. We need all parts of ourselves in balance to bring us into a stage of fullness. Want to feel more alive? Guided Archetype & Embodiment exploration can bring you back into a stage of wholeness by calling all parts of you back home into your body, rewiring parts you hold in the shadow from old programming. Energies such as summer, autumn, winter and spring all have a place to keep the world in a state of balance. As does wisdom, intuition, joy, vulnerability, playful sexuality, self-expression, surrender, fierceness and rage. We need them all. I have been doing this work myself as a woman the past few years (in big training immersions) and its changed my life! As an example; I am more fun, easier going, found more peace, rewired sensuality (more full body pleasure) and brought a healthier balance to the way I use ‘power’. I now move in the world with all my senses alive, and free to be me! Its soooo good.
This work also teaches you how to balance your masculine and feminine within as well as cultivating necessary polarity to bring more passion into your love life. I teach women the power of their menstrual cycle to be in better flow with your innate rythums, feelings and emotions. The cyclic work is profound and brought me to a new state of understanding and acceptance in myself. I have really learnt to love the way my soul wants to naturally move in the world without fighting it.
I am also a Shamanic Woman of Circle and was mentored by Wobley Matu Eagle Wolf of the Intuit line into Earth Medicine as a Wild Earth Woman. I have felt deeply called over the years to follow the Pathway of the Priestess, rebirthing and teaching cyclic wisdom, and remembering my ancient linage of reverence, ceremony and ritual. I feel deeply blessed to have a very grounded foundation in all things sacred. This holds me in my work in the work.
“What I do” is a series of posts (originally posted on my FB account) summarising the main modalities I specialise in & weave into my sessions for individual healing, personal growth & couples work. Over the years I have worked with a huge range of teachers, healers and mentors across a dynamic range of progressive modalities to access and heal the mind, body and soul. The tools I offer are one gateway to know yourself better.
‘When the student is ready the teacher will appear’.
You will work with who you are meant to work with from year to year as you are on your path to grow and shine. My aim is to open, support and realign you into a complete state of wellness and wholeness. To live life happy from the inside out. It starts with you. Now don’t worry so much about ‘how’ I do it… just know ‘what’ you want. That’s where we begin!
Big loves… Wendy.
Why do you allow yourself to be de-emasculated by your woman?
Has she slowly taken control of everything and you have no power? Do you mostly feel like you are just going through the daily routine and feel nothing?
Do you allow yourself to live like this because you cant be bothered doing anything about it, its not worth the fight, she is stronger than you, you cant get it right anyway, its the best you can do etc. etc…
You have been de-emasculated if your balls resemble something like dried up prunes and you have thought ‘I just don’t know how to make that bitch happy’.
Men. I have heard them all over the years…
I used to do this to my own husband. I used to treat him like a child, and I was sick and tired of doing it all, sick and tired of all the control and responsibility. I was flat out, sick and tired of it ALL.
Men. I was scared. It’s all a cry for help.
So here is the quandary. You think she likes it. You think she is scarier than you. You think its not worth stepping up and reclaiming your role in the house as the man and saying ‘Ill have my balls back thanks very much’. If you don’t take back your power, she will continue to eat you for breakfast.
Men. Why do you allow yourself to be de-emasculated by your woman?
You might feel powerless and controlled right now. But its your choice. You are allowing it to happen to you. Why?
Feel into your base, your hips, your power centre, your heart… Why?
What do you want instead?
Here is the secret. She is dying inside. She needs you. She needs you like never before to stand up to her and let her know ‘you can relax now babe, Im coming back, Ive got this’. Wrap your arms around her while she is raging and just let her feel your power. Begin there.
Real love is equal, balanced, sharing & kind, good conversation, true connection, joy and pleasure. How are you going? Take some time out to TALK… talk, talk, talk… share your truth, your feelings, the scary parts, open hearted talking… open the door to more. You both deserve real love…
Do not choose to tolerate another day where you are feeling squashed, downtrodden, lifeless and unloved. You deserve more.
(Power doesn’t refer to ‘aggression’.
Power is your healthy life force and you know you are alive).
And finally… there is no one model fits all…all relationships work in their unique way. So FEEL into what your OWN TRUTH in the matter is. Are you in your power? Do you like the way you are doing you and your relationship? Do you know how to be around men? Do you know how to be with a woman without loosing your power? Food for thought…
I know men out there that are just hanging in there, tolerating a completely shit relationship, feel powerless and ‘its the best I can do’… and I ask them ‘why’…?
Life is too short… fix it together, bring your love back to life, or get out.
Every man needs time to surrender.
Taking time to rest and reflect.
Every man needs to hunt and roar.
Taking time to stoke the fire within.
Every man needs to escape the world.
To rewild and celebrate his freedoms.
It’s okay to take the time and to say you need it.
To be released from the world to
dive deep in your man cave.
Go run wild with the pack and
remember that you are a wolf.
Fill your lungs with fresh air
and your heart with a passion for living.
Return to the world with glowing eyes.
Filled with Divine Masculinity & your heart wide open.
You are loved. You are appreciated. You are enough.
Go now. Run free…
Harvest time… where did Wendy go?
I’ve been laying low… did anyone notice? Did you wonder ‘where did Wendy go’?
I closed my town office early in 2018 stepping fully into what I was feeling internally… My soul was calling me to turn inward. To stop. And as an awakened woman, I am continually reassessing, realigning and re-evolving in the way I do me and my life.
I’ve been ‘out there’in the world ‘pushing‘ externally creating and delivering private sessions, workshops, retreats, circles etc. for ten years. And the ten years before that I birthed a Steiner School and lead other cool projects in my community. So yeah, I feel like I have been ‘ out there’ doing epic shit in the world for some time… Very driven towards helping people and helping to make the world a better place. Im just trying to make it all count really!
Anyhoo… an unfamiliar internal voice said ‘stop, no more’. I listened carefully to my intuition calling me to turn inward. I entered my time of Harvest 15 months ago… and I was curious to wonder what does that mean? My spirit was called to surrender and consolidate the journey I have taken. To rest and reflect on the good stuff I created and put out into the world so far.
Turning inward means I give myself permission to move slower. I give myself permission to rest, reflect and renew. I give myself permission to be less pushy and demanding. I give myself permission to be proud of who I have become and my achievements. It means I surrender to not having to create and ‘do’. Just being me is enough right now. Just as Farmer Hogget said to Babe ‘That’ll do pig, that’ll do’. The little pig rested.
I am so very proud of many things. I have raised two children into capable and loving teenagers. I have kept my long-term marriage alive, fun and passionate. I’ve healed my traumas and become a more authentic and open human being. I’ve walked towards my vulnerabilities, exposed my fears and connected more deeply to the world than ever before. I have travelled to immersions to dive deep with the best teachers, healers and leaders. I have allowed myself to be ravish by pain and pleasure. I have intimately touched the lives of hundreds of people as a coach, mentor and trainer. I have created lasting things in the community for people to enjoy. I’ve given myself full permission to create frivolous art. I have cultivated a circle of magical human beings around me to enjoy life with. Taking all the time that is needed to stop, and witness all of this, is part of my Harvest period. I feel held and nourished by the Earth.
We sow the seeds, we carefully tend to their every need and then, we harvest the rich bounty and feast together in celebration. Oh the newfound joy of mid-life reflections!
So, what is next? Nothing yet. I’m still moving slow and I have been ticking goals off like ‘becoming a rose gardener’. Plus I am currently Youth Mentoring two days a week and delivering private one-on-one coaching sessions by request. Its lovely…
I can see my emergence is out there in the future. Its formless right now. However, I sense I will be softer and wiser. More being and less doing by nature. Which means more intuitive and conscious. Less heady and pushy. More heart and feeling. More aligned, less compartmentalised. We are cyclic beings, just like the moon and sun. I am going with the innate flow of my personal evolution… Shedding scales and feeling into my new skin.
When I coach and write I try ever so hard to get it ‘right’. I strive in every interaction to deliver epic ‘results’ and give you a powerful experience. This means I am hard on myself. I am my own worst critic. Offering this to you is a part of my Harvest. Exposing my vulnerabilities and insecurities of how I think I am seen in the world. I can be scared of my own personal success and power. And because of this, I hold back what I say and how I show myself to you. I worry if I am not enough, or I will get it wrong. I worry if I am too much, or too little. We all have our failures. I am human too. I want to show more of my softer, wiser and surrendered self to you. I want to work with you from this heart open, heart felt, vulnerable place. I won’t always get it right. And that’s okay. But I will put in my best effort to love and support you. Maybe all of this will be an internal shift and you won’t notice a difference. Maybe you will. I will continue to be a Guide to tap into your true wisdom and activate your inner healer. This is my calling.
You can still work with me knowing this, knowing who I am and where I am at… moving slower and yet more powerful in my abilities as a Personal Coach. Let us navigate the abundant chaos with hearts wide open…
“Emotional Coach Wendy weaves talk therapy, embodied breath and subtle touch for heart opening, emotional healing and personal transformation. A blend of progressive approaches for authentic healing & growth. Wendy guides you into your body to access your truth & wisdom”.
’It is like finding all of the missing pieces in one place’.
‘The most heart moving and opening experience I have ever had. I now see me’.
‘Wow, what a journey. I actually got so much more than I was expecting. Such a safe environment to explore myself’.
‘Thanks for all your wisdom, direction and fun’.
‘I am much more confident in myself and happy to put myself and my needs first’.
‘My relationship has improved lots. I just can’t believe how much better I feel already’.
‘Working with her has changed the way I view myself and the world I live in’.
Wendy is a certified Facilitator, Neuro Linguistic Programming Practitioner, Generative NLP3 Practitioner, mBIT (multi-brain intelligences) Certified Coach, Time-line Therapy Practitioner, Conversational Hypnotherapist, Trauma Informed HeartTouch Practitioner, Womens Circle Leader, Sacred Space Holder & Woman of Ceremony.
Wendy is continuing evolving through personal embodiment, Pathway of the Priestess, Shamanic Ritual & Sacred Earth Medicine. She is a Kundalini Tantra Student and committed to supporting long-term lovers. Wendy also is a Awakening The Virtues Educator, Behaviour & Emotion Coaching Practitioner, Cert Reiki II and Family Systemics Healer.
Sessions available now via Skype and home visits.
Suitable for individuals and couples who want more from life.
PM Wendy direct with your enquiry.
Hey lovelies… Im very excited to announce Im taking on a new role to professionally mentor and personally support young adults at Joblink Midwest. Already I have been welcomed by the gorgeous and dedicated team in the Geraldton office.
The past week I have been reflecting on the needs of young adults and the challenges they face today. It has lead me to revisit my own, often tumultuous young years of searching, wondering who I was, how I fit into the world and where was my place of belonging… Oh the anguish of the young years… Some days filled with darkness and unanswered questions. I remember once, balling my eyes out, snot coming out of my nose sobbing my sad story to an ‘old lady’… asking for the keys to life! And she just listened and said ‘my love, you will find your way, you will do a full circle and come home to yourself, all in good time (its the way its meant to be)’.
I remember thinking ‘well fuck that doesnt help me right now in the rough sea of life one bit!.
Nevertheless, I burst forward and got on with my life… and all these years later, I discover… she was right! Over the past 25 years, I have done full circle… Searching for me, finding me, loving me and coming back home to rest in comfortably in myself.
I big part of how I have found myself in the world is through years of years of personal coaching, mentoring and transformational healing. It just happened to be my way… I am always learning something new. I also knew I was going through my stuff and doing it for me, and also to ‘share’ with others like me, on the journey of life. You see, its the way its meant to be right…
So I am ready for something new… I closed my private practice in Geraldton and landed in a new home at Joblink. Ready to love those who need support on their journey – the unfolding of who they are, ready to make their mark on the world… Maybe I will be the ‘old lady’ they turn to.
I haven’t worked for someone for 15 years! So this is super exciting. And I have given myself a little pep talk about ‘you can do this’ so I am all good to go.
I will still have a little spare time to do a little private coaching. So if you would love to make contact and work with me one-on-one, please just send an email. I can do one home visit a week in Geraldton for Parent Training, Relationship Support or Personal Life Coaching. Thank you so much to each and every one of you. You have been my personal coach and support me to be a better person every day. Big loves… keep radiating sunshine… xWendy.
Some of my personal reflections this week, as I prepare for my new role…
Re//defining the mission
The purpose of challenge is to awaken the wisdom.
Finding your own way in the world.
Awakening to be fully alive in your skin.
To know your inner uniqueness and water those seeds into being.
Find your place in the outer world and choosing your direction to explore.
Along the way we will be challenged and at times feel swallowed by hardship.
We enter doorways into the void knowing it is how we grow and get comfortable in our skin.
To go around, circumference something. Desire for honour and power.
Earn one’s place in the world. Particularly pertinent to the first half of life.
To go up and under. To go after what you desire.
Spring into being to ‘wake up’ from your slumber. To come alive into your being.
To put forth an intention or goal.
A lifting of the veil. An uncovering of knowledge. An unravelling of the things we hold onto.
A gap that is wide open. The necessary ‘void’ created in challenges and times of despair.
Seeking the sacred seeds of self, buried deep inside of our soul. The journey of life.
The embodiment of knowledge, learning and experience on the journey of life.
A staged human journey of spirit taking form in the flesh. Winding our unique way through the map of humanness. It is meant to be this way… As a young one, we are immersed and sometimes overwhelmed in the map. As an elder, we sense and witness the map from a distance.
What is a Mentor?
“Imagine the chance meeting of an anguished youth and an old salt. Delivering the opportunity to be met and witnessed by someone who has survived those very same difficulties and overcome them. That can educate you, support you, about life, in this world in a deeper way after their own journey through the suffering. A mentor can support a young person in trying to awaken and finding their way. To be held in the eye of the storm”. Michael Meade@Living Myth
What is a Coach?
The essence of coaching is to help a person seeking change and help them go in the direction they want to go. Coaching supports a person at every level in becoming who they want to be. Coaching builds awareness and empowers choice. It unlocks a persons potential through breaking down old habits and unlimited beliefs. Coaching supports you to learn and see how uniquely amazing you are, ready to take on the world in a new way.
The Awakening of the Elder
After going around the circumference of the first stage of life (the outer adventure),it becomes time to enter the second half (the inner adventure). A turning to the deeper ambition of the soul. It requires aiming at those things that may be not so obvious, instead of seeking power over people and things. It might just be the greater risk and the greater adventure in order to live more fully. The second adventure connects the mind and the heart, and the individual soul of their genuine work (their dharma), serving something beyond ones self that makes the world more beautiful. Eldership is a state of mind, a state of soul, everyone has an inner sage, an elder in their soul. And so, it doesn’t necessarily require people to become older to become wiser, it just requires that all of us that whatever age we may be, that we wake up to the wisdom and the visionary elderwaiting inside to be recognised within. Michael Meade@Living Myth
Did you know the mythical phoenix built itself a pyre and adorned it with sacred herbs and resins, in readiness to step into the death fire of its own making. Innately knowing the pathway in order to be reborn as the bird of paradise. Deliberately entering into the beginning of a new cycle. The phoenix obtains its new life and wisdom by arising from the ashes of death. Surrender to the awakening… Surrendering to the ‘chaos’…
… my big news….
Mindfulness for Women
Ask your workplace to engage me – especially for women. Connection, unity and mindfulness. Are you feeling stressed at work?
Are you NEW to My Coach Wendy?
A very big heartfelt welcome…
I am here for you…
…. what you focus on is what you get…. bammmm….
Whatever you are focussing on, thinking about, directing energy towards – is what y o u are creating… where energy goes, life flows.
Are you happy with what you are manifesting?
Need a mind reset?
What are you thinking about right now?
What are you feeling when you give yourself permission and space to actually DROP into what is going on in your body right now?
…. give yourself permission to feel it…
Do you like what you are experiencing?…
what i f… s e x IS the glue?
So if sex is the glue that keeps a marriage connected, passionate and lasting… how are you going with that?
Do you feel angry, worried, sad or on the right path?
Come witness the truth of it all… at the ‘taboo’ Circle powerful offering 29th October.
All things pleasure, passion, connection, relationships,menstrual wisdom and intimacy with Q & A.
Do you feel like there is something deep inside of you blocking your ability for pleasure and joy?
Do you feel like your spark for life is dull?
You want to be at this Circle -a once off eye opening experience.
Bring yourself to life. Come and listen and learn techniques to change your life.
The ‘taboo’ Circle – I will share with you very intimate things from my own life. My own journey through relationships and sex towards authentically loving myself – being in the seat of my power as a grown up woman. Dive deeper into cyclic wisdom – here we will go more into all things menstruation… WHY: because this is the wisdom that allows us to finally accept ourselves and all our ‘parts’ as women – moods, creativity, libido, connection, wisdom, dreams, feelings and all the crazy shit in between. If you are not using the wisdom of knowing your full cycle – YOU are missing out on the flow of life as a woman. YES I am serious! When we live by our cycle… the flow of life is sooooo much easier… the penny will drop, light bulbs will go off, dots will be joined – you will see how everything you already are is – actually screaming I am a W O M A N… and you will get yourself as such a deeper level.
🌟This Circle will be on Saturday 2pm – 29th October. $35.
🌟At Straight Up Health on Gregory.
Open for bookings NOW direct to firstname.lastname@example.org ***
take the journey… you can do this !
When you take a personal journey with me as your professional coach and personal guide… this is what you can expect;
* A deep and profound journey of healing and positive change… * Clear blocks and emotional stuckness from your being… * Tap into exciting new aspects of yourself as a woman… * Activate in your true source of internal wisdom… * Become an empowered cyclic woman… * Step into your true essence to feel whole and complete… … plus… much more… come join us….
Does this sound a bit like you… ???
I am not connected to my husband…
We just yell or speak rudely…
We don’t even talk much anymore….
We haven’t had fun together in ages….
I feel really down and have lost my energy….
We just do our own thing now….
I am at a loss as how to fix it…. He wants to have sex with me but I don’t feel like it…. All this makes me feel like shit… worried its broken… scared…
We are passing ships, where has the spark gone?
Are you with the one you want to grow old with?
* Come and do my Relationship Reconnect 3 session program
* Come learn the simple way to grow back together…
You can fall back in love… in a new grown up kinda way… its cool.
(I have done it!) xW
Are you being r e a l ?
You have to be authentic if you really want to be happy and successful… you can’t fake it.
Because you are actually fake it to yourself… and we ooze or vibe out our truth anyway.
To fake everything is okay… you have to stop feeling… and then you become numb and wonder why you are not ‘enjoying life’…
It is all connected.
And so it begins with being real with yourself…. what you are actually thinking and feeling matter.
That is all that matters.
Get this bit right and a happy successful life flows with ease…
Are you goddamn sick of doing it the hard way?
No more faking and waiting for your time to come. Come get it. xW
Pissed off at the world?…
At some stage in your ‘grown up’ life you have the invitation to meet your own needs…
To stop the dead end cycle of wishing, wanting, waiting for ‘someone’ else to make you happy…
Like to be safe, loved and held.
Once you realise Y O U are the only one who can do this – for you…
…a whole new world of whole and complete opens up… life gets easy, filled with love and life…
If you are feeling pissed off at the world, others or yourself – get in here!
If you are projecting your shit onto someone else… blaming… complaining or resenting and you want to fix that…see you soon… (real life begins here)… lets get in and get it sorted…
No one has died in here yet claiming their happiness…(I have got you)…
So don’t you think we are all a little mad?
Well I think so – I honour and treasure this in myself.
And I honour this in YOU.
Normal is boring.
If you are striving to be ‘normal’… what the heck are you after?
What do you think ‘being normal’ will give you?
I am unconventional. I swear. I tell it like it is. I love me. I accept me. I don’t judge you.
You can’t tell me anything that would shock me. I have either done it, or know it.
And I know what you are really after is acceptance – and you have to give it to yourself FIRST. What if you just accepted yourself the way you are right now?
Warts and all, and just love you now?
I was labeled as being ‘depressed’ once. Yep, I was super sad.
My dad was killed some time before and I was still deep in the black void working my way through childhood stories, trauma and a whole world of dark and bottomless pain… label=depression.
I was also told once by a shrink that I had ‘slight schizophrenic markers‘. No shit, that was a life defining and super proud moment. I knew then – I was cool! Warts and all.
And then she said… ‘we are not sure where you fit (or what to do with you) so we recommend you take the pills and be on your way’. That is when I knew that the label system was not for me.
At a time where I could have really used good support, I got nothing of value. (It sure was a very interesting and eye opening journey, and still glad I checked it out).
And off I went to heal myself.
That was when I really immersed myself in the study of human behaviour and the penny dropped (and many times after that).
I was not ‘normal’. Was I completely sane? Who cares really… I was like every other human.
A little bit broken around the edges from life. That is real life. I was a real life human.
I was cool. I begun to love and accept me. And did lots of healing too.
I love coaching. I see myself walk in time and time again. Tired. Exhausted. A little broken.
Sad. Overwhelmed. Lost. Confused. Full of questions about ‘how‘ and ‘why’.
I have always asked big questions about life – its taken me a looonnnnnggggg time to ‘get it’.
So… do I think depression and anxiety are necessarily medical human brain malfunctions? NO.
I just think its easy to take the label, fill out the script and that makes everything somehow okay.
And we can defend our label by using it as an excuse for being hard to live with. (and I knew I was cheating and lying to myself when I took that pathway too).
If you are anxious, sad or in some place thats not working – its asking you to WAKE UP.
It is YOU sending a message saying – wake up, I need some shit sorted out here.
Stop pushing on, stop and work it out. Grow into your skin and own yourself.
The longer you let your sadness, anger or worries eat at you (suppressing real life human emotions), the harder it is work through – and yes, it can become a ‘medical’ condition if you allow it.
Our brains have the amazing capacity to recreate themselves. You have the power to control your feelings, emotions, thoughts, behaviours, choices in life, how you live and how you function. YES you do sunshine. Me included. And now I choose joy. And I know how.
I distinctly remember one morning in my darkest of days… sitting on my veranda crying thinking ‘what the fuck is wrong with me‘…
I ‘have it all, so why don’t I feel it’???
I said – right I am going to climb my way out from this darkness and rebuild MY life the way I want it to be.
I did heal myself, recreate myself and become the woman I wanted to be. A real life grown up.
I made a choice. I threw out the antidepressants and got my shit together.
I took 100% responsibility for MY life and MY happiness and sorted myself out pretty quick.
That was about eight years ago…
Since then… I have been fascinated and immersed in the whole field of human behaviour and became a coach six years ago… I have studied it from all angles – what we want, what we need, what we desire, what makes us tick, what makes us ‘happy’…. etc…
So we are faced with the modern day first world dilemma of living in a demanding world where ‘busy’ is (was) glorified, juggling all things life, wanting shit to be perfect, push on instead of fixing, blaming someone else, avoid feeling pain etc…
SO STOP – drop into your own self awareness and you will find your answers – there is a KNOWing deep inside of you that KNOWS you… your wellspring of wisdom. YES its in YOU right now.
Are you accessing it?
Or are you giving away your power and relying on outside influences to tell you what you need?
Are you allowing this to happen. Will you wake up and take full ownership of your body, mind and soul?
So… I can take you to this place in coaching, and then you have to listen for the wisdom yourself.
I don’t give you the answers. They are for you to discover, and heal yourself.
I will lead you to the wellspring… you must decided when and how much to take in. Become your own wise sage and find your medicines.
pic – Me and my yawning poodle… writing in the sunshine together…
What if I told you happiness IS a choice…
… I expect you might feel some resistance!
‘blah blah… so if happiness is a choice why can’t I do it so easily hey!’
Some say we are either born a pessimist or an optimist…
I guess by now, you might have discovered what category you fit most of the time…
We are told to repeat affirmations…
Keep a gratitude journal…
Train our minds to look for the good…
So why are Y O U here?
Have you figured it out yet?
Do you think there is life on other planets?
(What if you were given a golden ticket that you cant remember you received and you chose to come here and have this weird earthly human experience)?
Are you making the most of it?
DO YOU FEEL IT in your heart?
Or is your head getting in the way of your ability to embrace joy and pleasure?
Are Y O U making the most of your everyday….
Or are Y O U fighting it… your own not-so-silent war on happiness?
So here is the thing… Y E S you have that choice.
– Looking for the goodness.
Can it really be that simple? Y E S
And why not!
Why choose to struggle?
So I challenge Y O U… to look for the goodness… I want you to get so amazed in every moment at what already is around you. Take a deeper breath. Tune your ears into nature. Turn your heart on. Open your eyes and take a fresh look right now. S E E hear and F E E L what is already magnificent around you. If you cant see it, slap yourself and take another L O O K.
Colours… smells… tastes… sounds… textures… feelings… temperatures… all that simple goodness…
There is no point climbing the mountain if you cant be A W A K E and P R E S E N T enough to enjoy the view when you get there. Do you know how many unhappy rich people there are in this world? Too many!
So what makes happiness?
First – choosing it.
Second – the ability to feel and enjoy it.
As they say… you might get hit by a bus tomorrow.
Did you make the most of this perfect moment?
ASK yourself these NOW:
What feeling do I want to feel more of?
What feeling am I longing to make a regular part of my life?
What is stopping me from feeling that way now?
What comes up for me when I ponder ‘happiness is a choice’?
What do I need to take action on right away?
Take for each day this week:
Turn on A L L of your six senses.
– see – taste – touch – hear – smell – felt sense (internal gut wisdom)
List the simple goodness around you right now. (Keep noticing… more and more!)
Do this daily.
Love ya…. x Wendy.
A R E you HAPPY?
Take the test….
Still some places available – Womens Circle
Come and join us for four August nights… your invitation to dive deep to explore yourself in a new way, create positive change and grow.
RSVP now to get a spot.
Its likely to sell out…
Just $25 to come along. RSVP is essential.
*** SOLD OUT ***
The Mother and Daughter day retreat is sold out…
Welcome back to Term 3… N E W S ***
Want to experience yourself in an embodied way?
What is mindfulness? Come test it out…
Why do you want more of it in your everyday life?
How busy is your head right now?
Are you connected to your heart?
Are you so busy ‘getting through the day’ you have disconnected from joy?
Are you accessing your own wisdom?
Here is a ‘taster’…
‘Test out’ how good you are at feeling, listening and connecting to yourself.
You need to allocate 20 mins all to yourself to do this.
Sit or lay somewhere quietly, all on your own. Uninterrupted.
This is a guided meditation for women to experience ’embodied wisdom’.
NOTE: If you feel like this was difficult or you couldn’t access your heart and gut… this indicates your head is really dominating your life. So you might be feeling pretty strung out and tired. Like your head wants a break and looking for a new more balanced way to live?
We are Straight up about good health…
Body, mind and soul…
We are straight up about all things GOOD HEALTH.
Come and read all about it…
To begin your journey to good health… simply pick a Practitioner today.
If you are stuck… (with so much on offer it can be a hard call to make) listen to your body, what does it need from you right now? Help to get your diet right, a good massage, release stress, chiro, learn how to stretch, mediate or maybe some strategies on how to get happy from the inside out.. Y E S – we do it all *A N D * S O * M U C H * M O R E *
Know when to socialise and when to rest.
Learn when you are a sensual Goddess or wild woman.
Sound interesting? Wednesday 25th May 7.20pm.
(and three more after that)
Couple of spots left. Last call ladies…
Experience mindfulness and meditation in Sacred Circle. xW
Mothers and Daughters Day Retreat
Hey mums with a tween girl.
Worried about how to transition your girl into a confident young woman?
Want to ensure that getting her period is a positive experience?
Longing to spend quality time to strengthen your loving bond and communicate better?
This is for you. Get on the list now. Its already filling up fast.
A full day retreat coming up in July. xWendy
One F R E E for you…
F R E E in any session with me includes a Homeopathic remedy, essential oil blend or Childrens support remedy.
Here are the kids remedies I stock. Which one would you like? Handcrafted powerful natural healers to get through any difficult situation. A safe way to empower your child through change.
Adults are invited to select a F R E E remedy to match the coaching you are engaging in…
Such as Personal Life, Parenting or Grief and Loss.
Choose your remedy…
Are you happy in your marriage? What if you could apply one word right now to improve this? Are you happy at work? Are you happy at home? With your friends? Parenting?
So think about the area you are not happy with right now… Such as the current state of a relationship… your lover, a friend or workmate.
Decide on what is causing you pain? What is wrong? What is not working?
Now from the BIG list below… I want you to pick O N E word only… the one that you know fits.
There is one here that will be the remedy. The one you know in your heart is true.
Take it like a pill. It is your own magic potion.
As if I gave you a script for it and said you have to take it with every meal.
Apply it to your skin once every hour. Immerse in it.
Use it. Talk about it. Share it. Speak it. Be it. Saturate yourself in it.
And notice what begins to change over the weekend.
Test it out… and let me know how it goes for you.
Happy weekend beautiful people. x Wendy (come let me teach your more about the power of the Virtues)…
The Chaos Years… being a parent…
Parenting is the toughest thing you might ever do…
Particularly in the chaos years… its all about teaching and takes so much time and energy.
You are not alone.
Here are some of my most popular and well used remedies for any tough situation particularly for the young years:
Most families have about an hour in the morning from getting out of bed to getting into the car and making it to school on time. We would all like this with less yelling and more cooperating. This is possible by introducing this simple morning routine. Kids love a rhythm and routine to count on. It is our job as parents to teach and guide on what is expected. Lets begin with the effective Morning Jobs Chart.
Get an A4 piece of paper. Set up your colourful crafty bits on the table ready to have some fun.
Your child traces their own hand, and writes ‘name Morning Jobs’ at the top.
Write at the point of each finger the five expected repetitive tasks your child has to do every morning. Eg: brush teeth, brush hair, get dressed, pull up bed, eat breakfast, pack bag, shoes on.
Explain to your child simply they are in charge now for getting ready in the morning from now on, by following their Morning Jobs chart.
Each morning you can sing a made up ‘Morning Jobs song’ and hold up your hand like a big star saying ‘Morning Jobs’ time now… off you go little morning crab, or happy bird. Make it fun. If you see me around school I will sing you our morning song as an example. J
Extra notes: No technology or TV in the mornings is advisable. Whilst your child is engaged in any media their brain is not on task and they are not with you. You can introduce this chart from the age of two by sticking little photos of your child performing the task for those who cant read yet. Make new charts as your child gets older and the five tasks keep progressing eg: Get ready for school, feed the dog, take out the rubbish, tidy my room, feed the chooks, school reading or times table practice.
The secret to raising happy healthy kids who thrive is embracing the wisdom that the first seven years of parenting is all about teaching. Our children look to us for everything. It is our job to guide them with a balance soft and firm love. Assertive positive parenting creates dependable boundaries that allow our children to feel loved, safe and protected. Here are a few practical tips;
Have a morning routine that your kids can count on and stick to it. You are the boss.
Little brains are rapidly developing in the first seven years of life. Therefore keep parenting simple and dependable. They need this to be able to hear you and follow instructions.
Keep your language in the positive and to the point. You don’t need story telling, over explaining or negotiating under the age of seven. Eg: shoes on, sitting at the table, listen, bed time now.
Over the age of seven your child moves into the next developmental phase where you will see all of the foundations you have laid come to life. Now the most effective parenting practice is using open-ended questions to build independent problem solving and life skills mastery. Eg: what are your options, what else do you need, tell me about it, how did that go for you, and what else?
Eat good food and get plenty of sleep. Sets limits and be the firm guardian for all technology usage.
Embrace the primary school years by not overscheduling your lives. Create space and stillness.
She came in for an intensive Parent Training session today and left by saying ‘I am actually really excited now to go and collect my boys, I am feeling really positive again’. She has a new plan to get her boys to listen, do as asked and speak kindly. A new positive way forward for their whole family. Its going to make a big difference to the heaviness she was experiencing through the tough job of parenting children in the chaos years. Parent Training offers a rapid solution to the areas you are struggling to solve on your own. xW http://mycoachwendy.com.au/parent-coaching/
Special Event Coming Up
C O M I N G S O O N by popular demand…
We have been talking about this for awhile now!
I am planning a Mother and Daughter Circle.
This will be a day retreat, a very special mother and daughter day for those with a tween approx 10-12 years of age.
So mums, what would you like to see this day include?
The ‘topics’ list is being compiled now. Share the word…
Come visit my FB page now.
Or send me an email email@example.com
How to stop procrastinating!
If you don’t like how things are right now, do something about it.
Okay that might sound blunt!.. So I am a realist…
Stop procrastinating and make a move.
What is one small step you can take right in this moment?
Choose one thing.
That breaks your ‘stuckness’ cycle.
You can choose to remove procrastinating from your life.
You can choose to stare at the board of life… trying to escape that it is your turn… OR
Choose to make your move. N O W
Procrastination is a stalemate position.
Why are you avoiding this?
Why are you stuck on it?
What is it really about?
So here is how to ‘fix it now‘… Be in it. Internally explore it. Decide. Make your move. And now move on.
T O P tip when humans around you ‘behave badly’…
Life is a collection of how we interpret what is happening around us.
There is no solid truths, only what we perceive to be ‘real’.
Perception becomes our reality.
We might believe our reality is ‘right’ or the ‘proper’ version.
We filter and cast our swift judgements based on our views on ‘being right’.
I am pretty sure now that science and spirituality agree now that the only ‘real’ thing about life is the pure ‘vibrating’ energy to our existence.
So why then are we taking being human so serious?
I am currently half way through a study group that is presently examing the facets of ‘being human’ from every angle. The past few weeks I have felt really bogged down analysing these human aspects from one extreme to another. Its kinda got boring and made me feel like I am examining our species in a petri dish. Its been wayyyy to intellectual for my wildly complex feminine creative brain! And then I remembered, not to take ourselves too seriously or we miss the everyday joys happening in the now. I have been practicing to ‘sit in my discomfort and wait for the learning to appear’. (and I am still in this discomfort and experiencing other learnings).
We are all here to create meaning, live with purpose and just enjoy the journey as much as possible.
And so today, I had another simple reminder. A conversation with a person who I could say was ‘behaving badly’. Now I could turn this into a drama or ‘read’ into it, make it more than it was…
But instead I focussed on there is no truths, only my perception. I ask myself a few awareness questions (below)
I quickly realised, it is not my story.
She is having a super ‘bad day’… and she confessed to this later on.
So it reminds me to share with you a few VERY POWERFUL ways to deal with ‘difficult’ experiences, situations and people. (I use this stuff myself regularly). All around us, we have opportunity to grow and make interesting discoveries… I invite you to embrace yours too.
Being in the experience: Say to yourself – ‘Ahh that’s interesting’… Just be in the feelings without fixing it or wanting it to go away. Simply be in whatever you are experiences. Experience the layers of the discomfort. This often delivers fresh insight and things you have not seen before because you have been so focused on moving forward too quickly, rather than space just to ‘be in it’.
Learning from a distance: Say to yourself ‘Whats happening over there?’ Step away from the situation and then observe your reaction from a distance. What do you notice now?
What else do you see is going on?
Coach yourself: Is this about me? What is it really about then? What is happening? What is this triggering? Be curious and playful to learn more about yourself through this experience.
Stop runaway thoughts: Say to yourself out loud ‘STOP’ and ask ‘What is the hardest part of this for me?’ Don’t allow your head to overthink it. Get back in control. Deal with it. Directly address the ‘hardest part’ as a personal learning, and then move on.
And so the summary is: Observe ~ see it, feel it, hear it. Just be aware and let it be present. Breathe ~ just notice it. Expand it. Allow it.
Learn ~ deal with it in the moment. Learn. Move on.
Other interesting questions for personal enquiry: Where is your focus right now? What are you avoiding? What do you not want others to find out about you? What change would make the most difference? What thoughts are getting in the way of your own happiness? Where do you feel stuck or held back? What are you longing for really? Where do you want to be in one year from now?
And even more… If there were no limits what would your life look like? What story do you need to drop to move forward in life? Am I stuck or fluid with my opinion? Who are you most like – your mum or dad? What was holding them back from living? What is the belief behind the response (formed as a child)? What is your belief about it now as an adult? If you continue to believe this how will it affect the rest of your life? What other meaning could I give it? How is that now going to change my life?
Sending you big love right now… Keep on shining your light x Wendy.
Enrol now… personal development for $20!
Here is your opportunity to explore mindfulness and meditation as a personal development journey.
Womens Circles are an ancient and simple practice where women come together to explore topics and have fun together.
The next Women Circle taster coming up you will learn to harness the power of your Menstrual Cycle…
Learn how to track and use the archetypal energies you move through rhythmically each month, sound interesting!
It is very empowering and fascinating work… Are you coming?
Book now… places are filling fast.
During series two we will also be exploring overthinking, dealing with emotions and taking better care of yourself. Light supper and handouts included. $20 each.
Maggie Dent has always been a huge inspiration to me… As a woman, mother and mentor.
This story is a very personal look at this amazing woman, who so many adore.
A few things I love…
She is real life.
She knows the pathway to happiness is being real about life: the blood, guts, sweat and tears.
She knows that chaos and mess are a normal part of life.
She doesn’t take life too seriously despite the shit that unfolds around us in everyday life.
She inspires with her everyday woman approach to get the most out of every moment.
GIVE A WAY
The next ticket that sells to Camp for the Modern Goddess will include a F R E E one on one coaching session to the value of $160. Get to it Goddess. www.mycoachwendy.com.au Not long now – we begin our luxury personal development weekend together on 29th April. Last day to grab your ticket…
“Camp was an amazing and very special experience, which taught me so much. Wendy’s knowledge, dedication and care, is hard to put into words. The weekend was wonderful in every way. I loved the Circle, self care rituals, walk and talk, the Mandela and clay work. The meditations were incredible, the dance was lovely and the cyclic woman knowledge was so valuable. Thank you”. Claire from Perth.
Retreat subjects include : everyday mindfulness for women, feminine empowerment (and why you want more of it in your life), movement through dance, mediations and breath (take charge of your mental state), connection to your true self and your essence of being a woman, self-care rituals, handling difficult emotions and negative stories, the joy of art and craft, harness the power of your menstrual cycle (ancient lunar revival), bring the spark back into your sex life and relationship, declutter your life and bring back the joy. Plus doing nothing time for personal reflection. All work is gentle and a fun introduction to things that bring back simplicity into the lives of ‘busy’ women. Most of all, YOU will learn how to be your own best wise sage.
“I absolutely love Wendys camps. Her professional and individual style plus the way she can support and help any woman at any stage of life. The atmosphere was so lovely, welcoming and full of deep trust. Thank you so much for this amazing experience” Antje from Geraldton.
So P R O U D of these amazing clients… look how awesome YOU really are!
Here is a collection of what I said from the past week about some of my clients…
Just so Y O U see what we get up to in here at MCW… and what I might be able to do for you!
These were posted on the My Coach Wendy FB page incase you missed our good work lately.
Do you have internal conflict going on… like you can’t decide, you don’t like your options, your heart says one thing and your head another, you want to do it, but you can’t… you know the right thing to do by still take a ‘silly’ or no action? All signs of internal conflict. Together we healed this for one woman today… who wants to receive more love, her heart was starved for it… and yet she couldn’t break through the wall of ‘protection’ to allowed herself to receive it. Now, she knows it is possible. LOVE my job… (PS… her homework is to go test it out with her husband and she is excited). What ‘walls’ have you created that hold you back from embracing love and life to the full? xW
Relationship Reconnect is a series of three sessions. When she arrived she was ‘depressed, disconnected and heavy’ because of her ‘crappy marriage’. She said coaching ‘has made a huge difference, we are happy, talking and meeting each others needs’. They are enjoying more time one on one. All this, in just 6 weeks. Hows your marriage going? xW
He said ‘the way that I look at it I had two choices; I could either get stuck into this or lay in bed feeling depressed’. In just two sessions he has created rapid positive change by getting ‘stuck into it’. He has nailed so much in a short space of time: feeling more, become a better dad and so proud of himself living in his strength and power as a man. (overcoming depression, marriage breakdown and being ‘angry’). How does ‘being angry’ affect the way you deal with things? xW
Personal Coaching solves work problems. She has had a traumatic blow up at work. We took this through a creative problem solving process and it is now solved. She knows what to do, and she knows its going to work. Happy Weekend… thats me signing off from a great day… doing epic shit with super cool people. x Wendy.
I taught her a healthier way to deal with difficult family members after a ‘blow out’ left them very down, tired and sad about it all. Family relationships can be challenging… Through a guided meditation she learnt an empowered way to be in the feelings, rather than wanting them to go away (which takes an enormous amount of negative energy to maintain). Now she knows that herself and her family are number one and how to sustain this. ‘I am feeling really excited with this new way to thinking’. How do you deal with things that you don’t like? And how is that working for you? xW
Care plan created for new intake clients today. Together we will heal old trauma, grief and relationship issues so that she can embody the authentic power, wisdom and see in her that is weighed down by old emotional wounds. (and she is excited…)
In another new client, we will be working on her anxiety and the fact she is ‘tired all the time’. xW
I really honour Y O U… I think you are amazing as it takes guts and courage to come and say to me ‘I am not happy’…’my life sucks and I want to do something about it’…. ‘I really need to get my shit together’… It is all pretty normal stuff we all go through from time to time – so don’t suffer alone. Connect and create change. x Wendy.
Powerful women’s circle with these Mermaids at Shaun’s Surf Retreat today…
(you totally want to be at the next one). M O R E cool stuff coming up soon… Weekend Womens Retreat Womens Circles Surf Mindfulness Retreat
Grab yourself a ticket.
Oooooh yeah… get your Goddess on!
This is what we will be getting up to. (Shhhhh its secret womens business…) three spots left!
Retreat subjects : everyday mindfulness for women, feminine empowerment (and why you want more of it in your life), movement through dance, mediations and breath (take charge of your mental state), connection to your true self and your essence of being a woman, self-care rituals, handling difficult emotions and negative stories, the joy of art and craft, harness the power of your menstrual cycle (ancient lunar revival), bring the spark back into your sex life and relationship, declutter your life and bring back the joy. Plus doing nothing time for personal reflection. All work is gentle and a fun introduction to things that bring back simplicity into the lives of ‘busy’ women. Most of all, YOU will learn how to be your own best wise sage.
What Wendy does… what do you NEED?
There is a wonderfully wide range of offerings by My Coach Wendy.
What is going great in your life?
What are you putting up with?
What is sucking your energy source of happiness?
What needs to change?
What is stopping you from making that happen NOW?
Print this out and have a looksee lovely…
Print and Keep… U P and C O M I N G
Upcoming events: ‘Print and Keep’
I have a whole pile of personal development, reconnection and self expansion events coming up… immerse in Y O U… What more out of everyday life? Then get on board.
Here is my 2016 Calendar of Events. KEEP an eagle eye on my FB page for more info and how to join in.
I only offer limited tix to my events to ensure that YOU receive an intimate experience.
Who benefits when you are ‘selfish’? (and take the quick test now)
I still remember the first time I left my kids ‘all alone’. Was it fair?
My husband and I went away on a retreat together to nourish our souls, rest and reset.
Many thoughts passed through my mind one after the other leading up to us leaving… Should I be leaving the kids? Oh this is too selfish, I should just stay home. Will the kids be okay, maybe we should stay home then. I am just being selfish and should wait till the kids are older.
You know the ones.
I had been intensively parenting two young children through their early years and was so in need of some ME TIME. Plus my husband and I had drifted apart, through the busyness and we were worrying about the crack widening.
My dad died a couple of years earlier and the path of grief had left me weary and so tired. Gosh, I needed this, a break, me time.
Was I worth it? YES
Was our marriage worth it? YES
Would the kids be okay? YES
So off we went. And it was A M A Z I N G…
We went to Bali for a week long of reconnecting and rebalancing.
So who benefited from me ‘being selfish’ as warned by my inner critic?
Well… everyone – I felt alive again, my husband and I reconnected and my positive energy to parent was refreshed.
That was many years and many retreats ago now.
This became our annual ritual for many years.
And now I am an expert at listening to me and taking good care of those around me.
Taking the time to nourish ourselves in the busyness of life always reenergised me for the whole year!
Taking good care of me, takes good care of those around me.
TRUE STORY! Just do it. I highly recommend. And just tell your inner critic‘Y E S I am worth it’!. Are you taking good care of you? Are you feeling frazzled around the edges?
Who is suffering because you are not taking care of you?
Who would benefit if you were in better condition? Come to Camp for the Modern Goddess.
I take you on a sacred journey to reconnect to yourself and the things that matter the most. I will take good care of you. I promise. 🙂 xWendy (three spots left).
Do the quick ME TIME test: Have you lost patience with your kids? Do you yell too much? Does ‘everything’ seem to make you irritable? Have you lost the funky connection with your lover?
Are you loosing your ability to have fun and enjoy life?
for the L A D I E S – nourish your body, mind and soul at this weekend retreat. for the M E N – treat the Goddess in your life… especially if you notice she is tired and a bit frazzled around the edges right now. I promise to send her home to you more in love, present, flowing and in touch with who she really is… grab her a ticket online as a gift from you today.
Happy Easter… hope that you are enjoying the holiday and chocolate! We have been camping on our little boat floating around in the sea at the Abrolhos Islands. Its been joy to the world. Oh and a bit windy and soggy. But its all good, we ate chocolate and caught lots of fish!
Did you know on 29th April Camp for the Modern Goddess begins? Ohhh its BIG NEWS secret womens business!…
A weekend of luxury, fun and learning. Right here in Geraldton WA. Grab your ticket today while there is still time – just a few remain.
She had ‘one problem‘ with camp…
‘This weekend was the most groundbreaking course retreat I have EVER been to. I was completely under the surrender of our sisterhood and finally, I have all the tools I need to be ‘free’. There was only one problem… it wasn’t long enough’. Kate.
If you missed out, your next opportunity to get involved is coming to Camp for the Modern Goddess. Last week to get your ticket – we gather on 29th April.‘Camp exceeded my expectations. I had dismissed Goddess stuff as ‘woo-woo’, but it has been so powerful. I now feel unstoppable. I didn’t really know what to expect and was sightly terrified of attending. While parts definitely stretched my comfort zone, doing this provided some real breakthroughs. I came to see the power and beauty in all women – including me. I can’t wait to unleash my fierce, strong, sensual, wild, flowing and radiant Goddess on the world. Woo!!!’ Samille.Are you longing to connect to yourself and other women in a deeper and more meaningful way? Want to enhance the quality of your life? Want to create more goodness, balance and joy? THIS IS IT!
‘I wanted to go to this camp as soon as I seen it, and it totally exceeded my expectations. The Camp for the Modern Goddess was the best thing I have ever done for myself! The weekend really helped me regain my balance in life. I left with every fibre of my body feeling healthy and amazing and loving myself inside and out. I will recommend this to all the woman in my life. Thankyou so much Wendy you truly are an inspiring woman’. Amy.
A few tickets are left – although you want to hurry as ticket sales close in two weeks.
If you want to get your Goddess on – YOU have time today while on your Easter Bunny Break.
MORE info here about camp: http://mycoachwendy.com.au/your-goddess-invitation/ If you want all the nitty gritty about the weekend camp for women that begins on 29th April go to this link, fill out the little ‘tell me more’ form and you get instant intimate access.
‘Wendy is fabulous. She is real, relatable and authentic. Her practices are unique and she knows how to touch you without you having to expose yourself. In her care you can feel, and see, the love she puts into every aspect of camp. Love, love, loved it’. Before camp was was feeling ‘time poor, busy and just getting by. Now I know ‘happiness is in the little things’. Brooke.
Are you speaking with your gut BRAIN?
Did you know you have three brains?
Don’t believe me.. well its true.
Did you hear about plain Jane who got a new heart and all of a sudden wanted to go base jumping? Well that is because the heart she received had stored memories!
Ever stood quietly in an amazing place and drifted off into the land of nothing and all of a sudden the most amazing idea of truth came to you? Well that is your inner gut wisdom being heard when you take the time to stop and listen.
Notice how busy, overwhelmed and bamboozled you get the more you allow your head brain to dominate your life by overthinking? Well that is because you are using only one brain when you have three others?
Does all of that sound a bit hocus pocus? Well that is because I operate in a place a little left of centre with my no nonsense approach to rapid positive change. And it works!… no 12 months of therapy needed in my world. Read more about it here – Want to use all of your brains to do cool things?
What does that mean for YOU?It means, if you are stuck on something, you can solve it in here with me – because we speak to all of your brains – not just the head! (that is already overworked).
Come test it out. What challenge or problem is overwhelming you? Want to solve it?
Is your child S A F E?
The only person who can really keep your child safe is your child himself.
Every child needs to be prepared to know what to do to keep him or herself safe. He needs to have some rules and to rehearse what he should do in certain unsafe situations. Here are some situations and some tips you can do and say to help teach your child personal body safety:
Strangers are people whom we don’t know or have never seen before. Most strangers are not bad, but it is difficult to know which ones are bad and which ones are good so we must be careful around strangers.
We don’t talk to strangers when we are alone. We don’t take lollies, money or toys from strangers or from anyone unless our mum or dad says it is okay. We don’t ride in a car with a stranger or with anyone else unless we have permission from our mum or dad. We don’t open the door when a stranger is knocking if we are alone in the house. We don’t tell someone on the phone who calls that we are alone in the house.
If a stranger tries to grab our hand or arm or says come with me, we yell “HELP” very loud and if we can, run away from them and go to the nearest safe place home, school, neighbor’s house) and tell a trusted grown up what happened.
Being Lost in a Store
If we get separated from our mum or dad in a store, we look for a safe person to help us find our parent. The best person to ask for help is the cash register person or a mother with children. If we are lost inside of the store, we do not go outside to look for our parent. If a stranger tries to take our hand and says “come with me”, we say in a loud voice “NO, you are not my mother or father; I can help myself”.
Private Body Parts
We should know the names of our private body parts—breasts, vagina, penis, bottom. We don’t have to let anyone touch or look at our private body parts and we don’t have to touch or look at anyone else’s private body parts if we don’t want to. It is OK to touch our own body parts as we have to take good care of them and keep them clean and healthy. It is OK to ask for help from our parents if we need help to wash or wipe our bottoms or put medicine on them if they get sore. If someone tries to touch our private body parts and we don’t want them to, there are 4 things we should do: say “NO, Stop That!” yell “Help!” if we need to run away from the person trying to touch or hurt us tell our mum or some other trusted adult. If someone (a child or adult) touches us on our private body parts and says “this is a secret, don’t tell anyone”, we should not keep that secret. They are trying to trick us. We are not bad if a big person touches our private body parts. The big person is bad.
The “What if Game”
The “What If Game” is played by asking questions that start with “What if”. Let your child then tell you what he would do in that situation. You may also let the child think up some of his/her own “What if” questions. This may show you some of the things he or she may be worried about. Listen to your child’s answers to the questions and see whether they would be safe things to do. If they are not, help your child think through a safer answer. Don’t put frightening details into the questions. It may only put fears into the child’s head.
A Secret Word
From the age of five you can teach your kids a ‘safe word’ or sentence. If your child is at someones house having a play, or staying over at a relatives house and doesn’t feel safe(teach them this can be a funny feeling in your tummy that everything is not okay) they can ask to ring you and say the safe sentence like ‘I think I ate too much’ or ‘My shoes are hurting’. And that is your signal to ‘come and get me right away please mum’. ‘I remember a time when my mum zoomed into my friends house with some excuse I had to come home right away (I was having a primary school sleepover). I was confused and didn’t understand why, I just had a funny feeling something was not right. Later she told me the neighbor had rang to say she knew one of the men in the house had been know to touch children’. *Becky.
What if you were lost in a shopping centre?
What if you were alone in the house and the phone rang?
What if someone tried to touch your private body parts, what would you do?
What if you are playing with your friends in the cubby and one asks you to take off your undies?
This game needs to be played on a regular basis so that your child doesn’t forget safety rules. Include other subjects such as health, manners, cleanliness, calling 000 in an emergency, etc. in the game so your child doesn’t become obsessed just with personal body safety. You can also back it up with little reminders over the next weeks. Eg: when washing in the bath say yes that’s right its important to cover your bottom from others and keep it private, good girl. Look for teachable moments that continue to carry on the message.
Thanks to: Crittentons Community Health & Education Department June 2008
Couples often seek out ‘marriage counselling’ as a last ditch attempt at making it work. And despite all the good and bad that might have gone on between you both, you can rebuild your love – if you choose so. Relationships are THE place we get our stuff thrown back in our faces, therefore the fact you are in a long term relationships means YOU actually have a wonderful opportunity to transcend what you know about yourself – the opportunity to tap into who you are, why you are here and what your life is really about. A lover supports us to get there. You can do this now, or do it with the next partner, this is our human journey, to fill the void, find happiness, heal you, find you and recreate yourself – you might as well do it with the one person who is already by your side. Time to love and live life by design.
Ask yourself this – are you with the person you want to grow old with? If you answer is YES then get moving on reconnecting before it is TOOOooooooo late!
Grab pen and paper and ponder these to give you a rattle in the right direction:
1) What do you want from your Couples Reconnect sessions?
2) So why are YOU really here then?
3) What are the ‘symptoms’ that your relationship is broken?
4) What distresses you the most about all of this? What keeps you awake? What breaks your heart?
5) What is really not working for you right now you want fixed asap?
6) What percentage of the problem is yours? And please explain briefly why you believe this?
7) What are your rays of hope for making this work, reconnecting and loving again?
8) Do you have your own personal unresolved issues contaminating this relationship? So what are they?
9) What do you have to prove by being right?
10) What is your lover really just not getting that just makes you so frustrated?
11) What are you priorities in life right now?=
12) What are you doing with your lover that is pleasurable? What are you doing that causes pain?
13) If you waved a magic wand what would be happening between you and your lover?
14) What are happiest moments and things that make you smile?
15) What have you got to look forward to together?
16) And what else do you want to need right now, or want to say about all of this?
Next – talk this stuff over with your lover… any insights you had. And if you need a hand, come and see me for the weekly lovers reconnect worksheets. I fell in love with my husband again, you can do it too! xW
This is what I am offering – please book now as the places are limited.
Ring the lovely ladies at reception to grab a $10 ticket 99644205.
Session 1 – 10am
Healing Stuck Emotions
‘Learn how to release emotions stuck in the body’.
Session 2 – 11am
Observing Runaway Thoughts
‘Learn how to not overthink by engaging whole body wisdom’.
Session 3 12noon
Better Self Care
‘A guided meditation journey to discover what you really need’.
See you soon… xWendy
Want to experience a Womens Circle?
I have created three opportunities for you to join in.
You might even want to come to all three!
RSVP quickly as I only take limited numbers for each Circle. Why attend? Experience something new. Connect to yourself in an empowered way. Be taken on a personal journey to learn more about yourself. Find authentic answers to things on your mind. Experience sacred space. Enjoy feeling free to be yourself. Connect to like minded women and make new friends. Check out first hand what a Womens Circle is.
It is a great taster if you are thinking about
coming to Camp for the Modern Goddess. All Circles are thoughtfully facilitated, so just turn up and enjoy the journey.
I have felt the pain…
As a woman who as dedicated her life to answering the big questions, I have done the hard yards.
I have always felt fascinated by,
and drawn to study human behaviour.
This begun because I too was
suffering and wanted to heal myself.
Every time someone sits to talk with me,
I hear myself. And I get it.
Always, we share pieces of one another stories.
My head, heart and bodies experience are
connected universally to you. So here are some of the things I too have suffered…
(and yes there are more);
Feeling lost and lonely.
Wondered how I fit into the world.
What is my place and purpose?
I have felt disconnected and loveless.
I have suffered grief and lost my way in the darkness.
I have spoken with hate to myself and not liked me.
I have lost many nights awake with worry and cried myself to sleep.
I have yelled lots, slammed doors and waited to be saved.
I have pushed on through the pain waiting for things to ‘come good’.
I have blamed, shamed and complained about everyone and everything.
I have wondered how to ‘change’ myself or others thinking it would make me happier.
Suffered in relationships and had my heart broken.
Parented my kids terribly and lost sleep over guilt.
So you see, we all find pieces of ourselves in one another.
I hear, see and feel this everyday – because it is what I do for a living. Supporting YOU.
So you might think you are the only one, or you are all alone. But that is rubbish.
We are the same.
You are loved. I get you.
You are enough.
I still believe in you, no matter what you say.
Everything is going to be okay.
And you know what – I am good with me and life now.
I am happy, settled and live with passion and purpose.
I will teach you, just ask. with love… Wendy. Reach out if you need a hand right now…
Intimately spending real time with yourself and the things that matter.
Classes and much much more. www.mycoachwendy.com.au click on Goddess.
You will return home feeling changed – just read the testimonials!
Want to know how to find the ‘right’ answers?
“Camp was an amazing and very special experience, which taught me so much. Wendy’s knowledge, dedication and care, is hard to put into words. The weekend was wonderful in every way. I loved the Circle, self care rituals, walk and talk, the Mandela and clay work. The meditations were incredible, the dance was lovely and the cyclic woman knowledge was so valuable. Thank you”. Claire from Perth.
Certified Facilitator, Practitioner and Personal Coach Wendy will professionally guide you over a fun filled weekend Womens Retreat to discover you have everything you need right inside of you waiting.
Women are feeling called to end this period of separateness by coming back together to create a connected community.
We are ready to rediscover our empowered state of belonging.
Time to dive deep and take a look at what you have been missing out on.
Retreat subjects : everyday mindfulness for women, feminine empowerment (and why you want more of it in your life), movement through dance, mediations and breath (take charge of your mental state), connection to your true self and your essence of being a woman, self-care rituals, handling difficult emotions and negative stories, the joy of art and craft, harness the power of your menstrual cycle (ancient lunar revival), bring the spark back into your sex life and relationship, declutter your life and bring back the joy. Plus doing nothing time for personal reflection. All work is gentle and a fun introduction to things that bring back simplicity into the lives of ‘busy’ women. Most of all, YOU will learn how to be your own best wise sage.
The stages to create positive change;
1) The realisation you want it. Awaken.
2) Gather info. Do your research.
3) Make the decision to take action.
4) Begin the journey. Go for it.
5) Doing it. And keep on going no matter what.
That gets ME excited… how about YOU?
If you need a hand… reach out. xW www.mycoachwendy.com.au
ready… set… detox!
Three things come to mind when we hit a new year:
Its NEW YEAR!… we get fired up about the kind of year we want, we might over indulge and want to detox.
We can go see our local naturopath to clean up our diet…
But have you considered the emotional stuff you hide in your body?
Do you have aches and pains, weird things happening that indicate that you need a mental cleansing?
These are the niggles, intuitive worries that indicate your body is full of the stuff we call ‘baggage’.
When you stop and listen, really listen to your own wisdom – what is it you need right now?
Well I want YOU to KNOW my speciality is the cleansing of baggage – a personal reset.
Yes you can ring now to book..
What are you dreams and goals for 2016?
Feeling like an emotional detox?
Begin your 2016 the right way – clean out the shit that is no longer serving you.
Create clean space NOW for goodness to flow in. Don’t wait any longer Goddess.
Make it YOUR year! It is going to be good…
Phone 99644 205 one on one face to face Geraldton.
Email me for Skype firstname.lastname@example.org
confessions… do you know me?
I spoke a mile a minute about my life,
grief and womens circles. Smoke was coming from her fingers.
Writer Samille recently interviewed me for her uplifting magazine Inspired. I spoke about my life journey so far…
I talked about being all Zen loving myself now…
And still, it is weird reading my story. I am guessing Samille picked the bits she thought you would find the most enjoyable.
Otherwise it might have ended up a book!
Samille asked me ‘who inspires you?’… Y O U do.
The everyday woman…
I have learned that the amazing stuff we are seeking doesn’t have to come packaged in big fire cracker moments to count.
What I needed simply was more love, connection, balance and real life goodness.
(I created a free mediation just for this article… enjoy Goddess).
The force is strong in you – so why not use it? In spiritual realms – the force is your inner knowing.
Is it your time to release 2015 and call in your magical 2016?
I too feel like a returning home to settle down.
I feel I am turning inward now to ponder all that has been.
No more planning – simply time now to reflect and soak all the experiences in.
2015 has been a wonderful year of continual transformation, learning and rebirthing.
It is something that I am constantly doing.
So at the end of any year we all get the opportunity to let go of anything that is not longer required.
To create space to calling in what I need more of. Call it a ‘spiritual detox’.
I especially recommend this practice if you are feeling tired and internally full from 2015.
If you feel like you have no more room left – yes you need to do this. We all do.
It is your time to listen to your inner knowing and truth.
The cells in our bodies are constantly renewing themselves.
Yes we are all grown up now and we get to call the shots.
The magical finale for My Coach Wendy this year was the sacred womens circle I held last week for Graduates from Camp for the Modern Goddess.
I performed a sacred Shamanic purging and cleansing ceremony where we all got to cut ties with everything in our lives that is no longer serving us in a positive way.
So as the sage smoke poured out the windows so went everything we had given up to release.
We experienced the vacant space this left behind. A feeling of personal freedom.
And then we invited all the positive things we wanted in that peaceful space instead.
YOU too can perform your own sacred ceremony to end your 2015 and welcome 2016.
Write everything out on paper that is no longer serving you, everything you want to let go of.
It can be old relationships, jobs, habits, emotions, stories, wounds, feelings, worries etc…
Keep writing until you are empty. Keep writing until you know your words have run out. Create a small ceremonial fire in a private place in a fire safe pot.
Surround yourself with beautiful or spiritually meaningful items.
Burn sage if you have it and play a powerful piece of music that connects you to your body. Read your list out loud to the fire and then let it burn. Say ‘I let go off…’
Consciously feel everything releasing from your entire body as you do this.
Give your worries to the flames. Keep saying ‘I let go off….”
Stand up and brush over your skin to make sure everything you want to let go of goes into the fire.
When this is done, stand for a moment to experience the free space you have created inside.
Put one hand on your heart and the other on your abdomen.
Notice how you are feeling. Lighter? More space? Freedom…
Next, ask your heart – ‘what is it that you want for 2016’? Feel for the answers.
Consciously invite anything in your heart longs for and needs more off.
Repeat this with your gut, your base of wisdom, truth and knowing.
Keep doing this internal practice until you feel filled up with goodness.
Feel, breathe and connect to your whole body, heart and soul.
If you really stop to feel and listen your soul will tell you exactly what it wants.
Be reminded that you are your own wise sage.
Close your own sacred practice in a way that feels right for you.
Use any spare time you get to yourself over the festive season to reflect back over the ‘year that was 2015’. Soak in all the good experiences with gratefulness.
For any tough experiences ask the question ‘what did I learn from this, what did it show me’?
This is a powerful way to use all experiences for ‘good’ and not evil.
Use the force if you have to!
Much love… Wendy. Note: this ‘fire’ image is from a sacred Indian fire practice called Agnihotra.
Merry Christmas, and a BIG thank you.
2015 has been a wonderful year.
Thank you to all my clients past and present.
I get so much joy in supporting you.
All that time we spend together one-on-one is always precious.
And thank you to all the women who have attended camps.
I am right there, dedicated to you, walking with you on the inner journey of growth to create rapid positive change.
I am just like you.
I too have been on a journey this year.
As I do every year, because one of my focusses in this life time is personal transcendence.
So I never stop learning. In fact – I L O V E it. I need it.
Every time I am in session with you – I am kinda in session too – YOU always show me so much.
I honour the amazing and deep work you have shared with me.
Every minute we spend together is such a privilege.
I see you.
I honour you. I wish you a B I G hand on heart Merry Christmas. Enjoy this coming festive and holiday season. See you when I reopen in February 2016.
xxx Wendy…. 🙂
Are ‘happy families’ an urban myth?
Ho ho ho… ‘Christmas is coming, the pigs are getting fat. Come put a penny in the old mans hat’.
Christmas time is a stocking full of mixed emotions.
Excitement over time off.
Worry over the ‘big list of jobs’ to get done.
Joy over the mornings we can sleep in.
Anxiety about your family coming together…
Anticipation over opening all the presents!
In my coaching practice I often have clients quietly tell me about their ‘difficult family members‘.
As if its something to be ashamed of, or worried if you get found out your family is not ‘normal’.
Well let me declare loud from Santas sleigh – no family is ‘normal‘.
Normal is an urban myth. Every family has its complexities. The one that you never hear from. The one you think talks about you behind your back.
The one who secretly goes around creating trouble.
The one who doesn’t invite you to the party to try and hurt you. The one who spreads stories and loves to create drama. The one who drinks too much and tells you what they really think. Its typical human stuff, we all are challenged by people in our lives, colleagues, friends or family.
We all worry in our own way as families come together over Christmas.
So why are families often ‘so hard‘?
We all have our own set of beliefs and values.
We all have our own version of wrong and right.
This is amplified when families gather.
And yes, this is completely normal. So here are my top tips for surviving Christmas if you too have difficult families members. 1) Choose kindness. Make this your mantra. Choose it on the day. Keep the word in your mind. No matter how your buttons are pushed, make it your conscious choice to practice kindness. 2) Keep difficult gatherings to an hour or two. Enjoy ‘Christmas time’ together and move onto the next thing. Often when difficult families hang out for too long it can get messy! 3) Remember you are there for Santa and the kids. Look at the smiles on their faces. Stay focussed on the joy of the day. Don’t use it as a time to rehash old wounds, drama and stories. Santa is watching you. 4) Show compassion. Remember each one of us has our own stories, drama and wounds, so practice compassion in the same way you invite that person to show compassion for you. Be the leader. 5) Don’t drink too much. If alcohol fuels your anger or frustration, don’t over drink around your difficult families members. That is only asking for trouble. 6) Create your own family – you are all grown up now and get to call the shots. So hang out with people who get you and love you. The friends who see the real you, and make you laugh and feel good. 7) If your family is just too hard and really gets you down – or if you are a Christmas orphan and not near your family – go and help out somewhere else where you know you will be appreciated. A local service club, church soup kitchen or practice random acts of Christmas kindness to those less fortunate this Christmas. Much love my friends… Wendy. PS – my stocking is up!… I have been a good girl this year Santa! PSS – an remember – WE ARE in fact the ‘difficult one in the family’ in the eyes of some of our family members right!… We all create our own stories, have our own beliefs and values. So just go on ahead and enjoy your Christmas.
The time has come…
Yes, it is true…
There comes a time in your life when you have to make change to take better care of yourself.
At some stage, we get sick of the BS that no longer serves us and we might feel ‘backed into a corner’…
The final straw that pushes us to make change. The sour icing on the cake.
You see, most often, we don’t create the change we are urning for, unless we are pushed.
Some of us listen with a gentle push, others it takes a big painful push.
Things happen, like blow outs with people, loosing a job, inner turmoil, burn out, emotional havoc etc… that forces us to the point of no return – YES change is calling you.
Like the two ladies I seen yesterday…
Both around the age of 30, and coming to ask big questions to reassess the way they do life.
One is sick of being pushed and pulled by family members who are draining.
She has to create personal boundaries to take better care of herself now.
She knows she is burnt out and physically unwell. Change is calling.
The other, is feeling called to change jobs.
One is not serving her, not her true calling.
Her gut feels churned up about how she is doing life. Change is calling.
Both of these lovely ladies continue to be examples of the everyday modern woman. Just like me and you.
So yes, there comes a time, when we need to stop and reflect on where we are at. Am I happy? Am I living life the way I really want to now? Am I living according to other peoples demands and needs? Am I taking good care of me? When I stop quietly what does my heart long for? When I listen to my gut instinct what does it call for me to do?
This is all a sign of being grown up.
Becoming your own person.
Fully living in your own skin and doing life your way now.
So right now, I ask you to look around at the signs happening in your life. What is calling out for you to take action? What messages is the universe trying to send you? What is causing you pain, worry or discomfort?
It is time to stop and take notice, reflect and ask yourself a few inner questions.
Psss… THIS is what happened!…
This weekend just gone… I facilitated a journey of self discovery for 11 amazing women at Camp for the Modern Goddess.
I would have to share that my own expectations were even exceeded as I witnessed the transformation these women made over a weekend. They went home with all the answers to their questions, and everything they authentically need to live a balanced and harmonious life.
It was pretty amazing…
Here is a little of what some shared:
“Camp was an amazing and very special experience, which taught me so much. Wendy’s knowledge, dedication and care is hard to put into words. The weekend was wonderful in every way. I loved the Circle, personal care rituals, walk and talk, the Mandela and clay work. The meditations were incredible, the dance was lovely and the cyclic woman knowledge was so valuable. Thank you”. Claire from Perth.
“I absolutely love Wendys camps. Her professional and individual style plus the way she can support and help any woman at any stage of life. The atmosphere was so lovely, welcoming and full of deep trust. Thank you so much for this amazing experience” Antje from Geraldton.
“Thanks Wendy. I was feeling very vulnerable the day of camp, but by the end I didn’t want to leave. I met some remarkable and beautiful women from all walks of life. No pretension and no judgement. xx” N from Geraldton.
I was feeling ‘terrible and sad’ before coming to camp. And now I feel ‘hopeful, positive and reconnected’. The beautiful people were amazing”. H from Mandurah.
Before coming to camp I was feeling ‘pressured and overwhelmed’. Now I see my future clearly. I see that meditation and the breath is the gateway to our truth”. K from Geraldton.
Before camp I was feeling ‘apprehensive, frazzled and a little frightened’. Now I feel like everything is possible. I have a newfound self awareness and perspectives. The beautiful all totally amazing women that were here, we all connected in someway. It totally exceeded my expectations. It flowed really well and was not forced. I was concerned about feeling shy and awkward and it was so caring, loving and that I felt totally safe. I give camp 11 out of 10! Wendy you created a safe environment for me to open up and step out of my apprehensions. And a chance to connect to other women, and myself. It has been an amazing journey of discovery. Thank you. I need time now to absorb the huge amount of realisations”. Sam from Geraldton.
“What a fun and engaging retreat. Wendy has the gift of opening you up to self discovery, helping you on your personal journey forward, to reconnect with your true self and what you need”. Dani from Geraldton.
Before camp ‘I was feeling like I was growing but not being authentic or in line with what my path and desires are. Feeling repressed. Now I feel my vitality, flowing, sensually fierce and fluid. What a wonderful thought out and caring camp. Wendy is amazing at what she does and has a wealth of knowledge to go with her fantastic energy. You will leave inspired, connected and full of love, vitality and energy. Take the time for yourself and take the risk. EVERY woman should have this experience”. Teagan from Geraldton.
“Camp flowed very well. I was feeling disconnected and constricted. Now I feel inspired to make changes and move on where necessary in difference aspects of my life. I learned to connect to my inner self and being more able to open and connect to others”. Z from Geraldton.
3 bits of exciting news for Women (only) okay one note for the man of the house… yes its about sex!
Hey Goddess…. okay a few bits of exciting and timely news.
Camp for the Modern Goddess beginning on 30th October still has spaces available. So if you are feeling like you want a reset grab yourself a ticket now. Here is the link – More here.
I am opening a second camp as so many of you can’t make this date and want still really want to come. The perfect way to prepare yourself for the arrival of the silly season. Feeling fresh and focussed. Reconnect to the things that really do matter to you. Handle your emotions better and flow through that busy summer time. Second camp date Friday 27th to Sunday 29th November.
Now the very special news… once you have been to one of my womens camps, you will be invited to special gatherings to deepen your experience of the feminine. There is only so much I can fit into camp, so I will be inviting you to a few special evening treats over summer. So if you really want to dive deep and begin a journey to reconnect to you and get more out of life… this is it. Camp for the Modern Goddess. I will talk more about this at camp.
Ring me later today if you have any questions – 0427 719 720. If I can’t answer send a text and I will ring you back.
Please note… there will not be another camp over the hot and windy summer months. So do come either the October or November camp if you are feeling called and need this in your life right now.
Go to my Instagram if you want to watch more videos of me chatting about camp. My Coach Wendy.
Men – okay a note just for you… if you have a frazzled woman in your life… buying her the gift of coming to camp might just be the best thing you ever did! The perfect early Christmas present. She will return home to you feeling content and reconnected to the things that matter. She won’t be as irritable or cranky or nagging. And yes we will be talking about sex and vaginas just so you know!
Womens Retreat experiences include : everyday mindfulness for women, movement through dance, simple mediations, connection to self and your essence of being a woman, self-care rituals, handling difficult emotions and negative stories, art and craft, harness the power of your menstrual cycle, bring the spark back into your sex life and relationship, declutter your life and bring back the joy. Plus doing nothing and time for personal reflection. All work is gentle and a fun introduction to things that bring back simplicity into the lives of ‘busy’ women. You will learn how to be your own best wise sage.
Graduate experiences such as : There is a sacred collective of women around the globe who come together to sit in circle to deeply connect, share and support one another on our journeys. As a member of #CampModernGoddess from time to time this summer I will invite you to thoughtfully selected Sacred Womens Business events and such as to experience different meditations, lovers reconnect, more on crystals, essential oils, eating for your body type, movement like yoga or QiGong, art and craft, yoni steam and pamper, talks to explore deeper subjects, personal journey work, natural healing modalities, crystal bowl healing, crochet vulvart, body painting and naked swimming and much more to continue to further embody your feminine by taking you deeper. Women belong together, sharing, loving and having fun.
Are you a hardArse lover?
Chances are if you are a tough hard arse lover your marriage it not in the best place it could be.
I used to be one of those.
Have to be in control. Organised. Call the shots. Make plans. Go here and there and everywhere. Building resent and getting damn burnt out and irritable. (and sex was a chore!)…
Where was the love, fun and joy. Bugger all!
When we ooze out vibes to our lover like ‘I am in control here, I am tough, I got this’… What we are really saying is ‘I don’t need you’.
That creates disconnected love… and you continue to energetically separate.
Our lovers continue to feel more and more lost as to how to love us ‘right’.
And so, the distance between you both continues to escalate. And by now, you should be hearing alarm bells ringing in your marriage ladies! TAKE ACTION.
So what is the answer… here are my ‘hot tips taster’,
and the way to swing back the pendulum of love and reconnection:
Give yourself permission to ‘get down girl‘ from your high horse and decide to let your lover take care of you again.
Men have to make some decision to be in their masculine power and to feel useful.
Men want to take care of you, they don’t like being made redundant.
Specifically communicate to your lover what your needs and wants are, he is not a mindreader. No blaming to long winded storytelling.
As him to step up in areas you want him to take back control of.
Don’t be a nag queen. That is a love killjoy right there.
Decide to learn more about the feminine and masculine as a rebalance of those innate roles fires up the passion in your relationship.
Let your lover really hold you, rest in his arms. Lay on his chest again. Be in his strong presence. Let him back into your heart. Let your guard down. That wall prevents you from free flowing heart felt sensual loving.
I will be covering this and much more at Camp for the Modern Goddess. Learn what it takes to be in your feminine, towards long lasting connected love. Fire up your love again, before its too late.
Are you addicted to stress?
Take my simple Stress Test ~
Do you feel restless if you are not ‘busy’ doing something?
Do you often feel shaky in your body, legs or hands?
Do you need to be moving, don’t like sitting still?
Do you loop stories, songs or count in your head?
Does your nervous system feel racy?
Do you talk fast and breath high in your chest?
Is your mind constantly running away to the next thing?
Do you find it difficult to enjoy lovely things and beautiful moments?
Do you desperately want to relax but just can’t?
Are you all go go go then flop in a heap crash and burn.
If you would like to reclaim balance, spontaneity and joy in your life I can support you to get there.
Don’t leave it too long ladies as an over worked nervous system can easily lead to larger more serious illness and sickness. Plus where is the fun in your life? You want to get that back before stress carries you away.
Decide now you are going to get off the stress train and make positive change to your life. I can help you achieve that rapidly. Just ask. xW
5 simple ways to embody the feminine today
I first was introduced to the concept of feminine and masculine many years ago.
I remember thinking it was such a new concept, where had I been all this time, why didn’t I know about it being female and how was it going to enhance my life?
And so over the past seven years I have worked to understand and embody it.
As a sign of the generational times I was raised by a woman living primarily in her masculine. In her day, women were encouraged to work as hard as the men to get out of the kitchen and prove their worth. People were encouraged to be all go and no stop. ‘Busy’ was praised.
What was missing a lot from our generation was that tender loving attention.
The ‘stopping’ to enjoy life and breathe.
We know our parents loved us, but we didn’t get to see it in action so much because our parents were so damn busy working to make ends meet. The loved us by providing.
At the upcoming womens weekend retreat I will be reminding you all about the feminine in you. And the difference this can make to your life, your marriage and your state of mind!
Five things you can do now to embody more of your natural feminine flow.
Dress flowing, let your tight hair down, breathe deeper and feel radiant. Be IN your body.
Don’t try to be ‘one of the men’. Celebrate you are enough right here and right now,
just the way you are, being a woman. Being female is not a competition.
We are built differently for a reason. Celebrate juicy YOU. (do you know her?)
Spend a little time today turning inward to reflect on your life,
who you are, what you want and were you are at with that now.
Clearly and simply communicate your needs and wants without storytelling.
Surrender into the strong arms of your man tonight and really let him in to love you.
Soak in his powerful energy in silence.
Don’t be scared about learning more about the feminine. It doesn’t matter if you don’t even know what it means. What I can tell you is the difference it can make to improve the joy in your everyday life.
If you are ready for some real and simple change in your life as a woman, this is quite possibly it. xW
The #1 Solution to the Dilemma of the Modern Woman
Most women in this modern world, just like you and me, feel somewhat ashamed to say ‘I am not happy’ as our problems aren’t exactly third world right.
But still, serious enough we want to do something about it now and get happy!
Even though we have the mod cons and so much more… something deep inside often pangs with emotions that pull us down and sabotage our happy. Why cant I just be happy? We exclaim in moments of real and raw.
And even ‘what is wrong with me?’ For others, you just want to fill that weird void and feel more. And the secret eludes you… Well, I know. I have made this journey too.
Over the past ten years.
Searching for the magic ingredients and the secret recipe.
So you want to know what it is right? Stay with me… For a moment, just gaze back in the history of women as you know it.
Ponder how women have changed, our roles, our status, our dress and even the way we live.
We have drifted through being hard or soft, shut up or speak more, get married and make babies, stay home or get to work. Are we a woman or a man?
Are we masculine or feminine? A mix or both? Who are we really?
Consider this – what kind of life did your Grandmother lead, your mum, and now you? Stop for this moment to consider your own state as a woman.
How connected are you to yourself? When you listen to your heart and gut, what messages have been coming up? What is your own truth?
In the past ten years or so women have felt a calling to connect back to our more feminine ways. Feel more. Love more.
Well the secret to happy is one thing… reconnecting to your feminine.
This is a personal internal journey.
Even though the results on your outside life are nothing short of profound.
What if you were able to fully be you, enjoy yourself more, feel more confident, less worried, less anxious, less depending on others to make you happy, feel more love, enjoy better relationships, feel more peace inside, be a better person… and so much more.
Reconnecting to your feminine is a feeling that you can learn to embody.
It is the cultivation of the real you.
I have embodied this work myself over the past five years.
Once a month attending a private and sacred gathering of women to connect to and explore ourselves. A personal internal journey of me and my feminine goddess.
I now, and ready to take the next step and offer Sacred Womens Business Retreats.
A weekend camp to escape the world. Learn, grow and shine.
Testimonials from a recent Sacred Womens Camp held in Geraldton recently:
~ “It was such an incredible weekend! I can’t thank you all enough from the bottom of my heart. Amazing how everything works out exactly as it is meant to be. Loving it”. ~ “An amazing experience! I can’t wait to get more of that in my life, thank-you so much”. ~“I had an amazing weekend with some very special women. All of you brave wild luscious women!!! Aaahhhoooo!!!!!!!”
Do you feel her calling?
Something larger than you deep inside.
This super moon in particular has stirred up a lot of stuff for women.
It was the moon to reflect, shed and release.
This means do not attach to the stuff, just let it come up and release.
Let it do its innate work.
How rattled where you?
It will depend on how much to stopped to feel its effect on you.
Did you go there, or did you deny feeling it?
Do you feel a calling?
Something larger than you deep inside.
This call is about transcending states you live in like overwhelmed, ‘busy’, inner turmoil, angry, sad, restless, disconnected, numb, bored, stale, lost…
It is about taking responsibility for yourself.
Now is the time. To turn inward. Listen. Feel. Connect.
What do you really want? Is it something more? Something different? Something else? Not sure?
Are you being called to take a inner personal journey of discovery and personal development?
When you are shown how to go inside, tap into your own wisdom, you really do have everything you need. And you know it.
Sacred Womens Business awaits you. Its an inner journey thing…
Confessions of a Mistake Maker. Me.
I make mistakes. Yes. It still happens to me.
I am real life. Just like you.
I say the wrong thing.
I make the wrong assumption.
I act before I think it through.
I read into something that is not there.
I didn’t choose my words carefully.
I reacted too soon.
I get emotionally drawn into a drama.
Yeah, I make mistakes. Just like you.
So today, while breathing deeply into my feelings I listened to my own advice – the same stuff I give you – ‘sit in your feelings Wendy’. Today be inthis discomfort. Breathe – feel – connect. ‘Be in it Wendy’. When we try to push away negative or uneasy feelings we are not dealing with it.
I sat with my feelings today in meditation, at yoga.
I have a feeling inside that I have made a mistake.
I said the wrong thing.
I feel disappointed in myself how I handled a situation. Breathe – feel – connect. ‘Be deeply in the feelings’. Could I have done better? Yes. Next time.
So I choose now to deal with it. By sitting in these emotions.
It is another opportunity for me to learn more about myself and grow.
Challenges create opportunities to look, listen and learn.
That’s the good part.
So I need to be compassionate with myself. Accept myself.
I am a mistake maker.
Take responsibility for myself. Breathe – feel – connect. ‘Be in it’. Sit in these feelings of personal discomfort. That was my task today.
Turn inward. Reflect.
Being right in these feelings have allowed me to be okay with it all.
Its not about the story. Its about me being okay with my feelings.
Confessions of a mistake maker. Me.
I am not going to avoid my feelings.
I am not going to carry this into the next moment.
I am not going to allow my personal disappointment contaminate my joy. Breathe – feel – connect. ‘Be in it until it fades away into acceptance’. I feel better.
All is well.
Time to be a full woman?
Is it time?
Do you feel a longing to be a real woman?
And what does that mean anyway! It is that kind of deep feeling inside of you that you just know, there is something more to you.
That you want to find her.
Not worry about what people think.
Feel free to be all of you.
The real open full raw and real you.
Want to deepen your connection to yourself?
Sick of the humdrum of life… wondering what it all means. Where you fit?
What is your life all about anyway? Do you feel alive and connected?
Do you feel stale, bored… lost?
Are you living… or just existing?
Is there something deep inside of you brewing… maybe sometimes you try to ignore that calling, or push it away so you can exist and keep on doing the things you think you are ‘meant’ to be doing.
You will know when that feels like you have ‘had enough’ and its time to ‘get real’.
That is your golden moment. Your calling.
I do not give you ‘strategies to cope’ in this world.
That the short sell. You want to be taken to a new place right?
I open the doorway for you to find yourself, connect and enrich your daily living.
Don’t look to soothe the symptoms of the daily grind. No.
Look to transcend what you and your life are really about. Set her on fire.
Get in touch. Bring yourself to life.
When you are connected, everything in your life becomes so much easier.
My work… takes you to your core. One-on-one. Safe. Trusted. I am here waiting for you…
The things I have never done to my kids…
Did you know I never pushed early education through fear of ‘missing the boat‘.
Instead we played in the mud, fell out of trees and collected the eggs.
I never thought much about formal education until my kids were 6-7 yrs old.
Instead we honoured the sanctuary of childhood and allowed them to be kids in the precious foundation years – the first seven years of life is simply about being a wild and free messy kid.
Did you know I have never ‘pushed‘ my kids to perform academically.
Instead, I have empowered them to ‘always do your best‘.
I have never scrutinised their school work in detail.
I have asked ‘ is this your best effort‘?
I have never drilled anything by rote or made them write things out.
Instead I have offered ‘what do you need to do to learn this‘?
We have never sat for any length of time doing ‘homework‘.
Instead I have said ‘focus and get all your work done at school’
and ‘home time is family, free time and play time’.
I have never busted them up for poor performance or mistake making.
Instead I have said ‘what is your next move‘?
My own parenting style is assertive positive empowerment. Be your ‘own bean‘.
I made the school of life learning my kids responsibility, not mine.
I have raised them to take good care of themselves.
I am the strong hold behind their journey towards adulthood.
I parent now… with opened ended questions and keep my expectations high.
Empowering my kids to solve their own problems.
Of course, I offer up suggestions and my motherly wiseness.
But essentially, its their thing now.
My eldest is loving high school.
Completely on fire soaking up that amazing learning journey.
Dealing with real life and thriving.
He simply loves learning! Loves school.
One of my sons gifts to the world is music.
My girl in upper primary came home with Naplan tonight.
Now I don’t get all fussed about these things.
However I take a closer look at her results and, its all good stuff.
She is fully embodyed in her own learning journey.
She loves school and information.
One of my daughters gift to the world is words. So now I reflect… how did I end up with two kids who are in charge of their
own learning journeys, love school and love learning?
It is because I have left that in their court.
I am a very high expectation person – never flippant about these kind of things.
This has been achieved because I have always had one rule… You must do your absolute best and you have to know in your own heart that is your truth. To authentically feel it is their own truth. They know right… Your best effort was always my number one rule for school.
Become the parent you wished you had
When we were kids muttered things under our breathe like ‘I am never going to do that to MY kids’! You grew up. Got married. Had children…
And then, you opened your mouth and you mum came out.
The early years are T H E most important.
I know, I keep on harping on about this.
It is never too late you know.
To step up.
To be the parent you wished you had.
It is really easy.
Top up your parenting tool kit.
Parent by choice, not by default.
You call the shots now.
Solve those bits you are stuck on.
For most parents who come and see me, it’s the same.
You are not alone.
So don’t think you are the only one.
It is the same kind of challenges we all face.
Simple stuff really.
Are you worried about your child?
Is your kid driving you mental?
Yelling too much and feeling guilty?
How about investing now in a life changing coaching session…?
Are you ready?
Come join our ever growing list of happy families with confident parents.
Drop me a line to enquire this weekend email@example.com
Private and confidential.
I believe in you, with love…
The after school kids coaching spot is very popular. Kids Coaching is especially for children
aged 8-12 yrs.
That is the best age for skill building.
I support your child to solve their problems.
I support your child to make the right choices.
To think for themselves. Come alive.
Come up with quality solutions.
They are fun, interactive learning sessions.
Often a parent will choose Kids Coaching because their child is going through a ‘rough patch’ or ‘struggling’ with a particular issue.
So an outside influence is easily accessible and positively powerful.
One on one in the privacy of my Geraldton office in Gregory St.
Private and confidential. Safe and secure.
If you can’t get that popular after school time of 3.30pm,
the next best time slot is 2pm-3.30pm.
You can just pop your child out of school early.
I usually recommend a series of 3 sessions only. Two weeks apart.
That seems to be the right number that ‘solves all their problems’, boosts confidence and gets your child moving forward in a positive direction once again.
Kids Coaching is suitable for children who ‘like someone else to talk over their problems with thats not mum or dad’.
Kids respond so well. Flexible, adaptive and energetic learners.
You see, they really do love learning new skills.
Kids Coaching is an simple and fast pathway to
get your child out of any negative sticky spots.
We don’t like to see our kids suffer.
We want them to learn from mistakes and shine.
That is what Kids Coaching is all about. Recent examples include: Helping a 8yo boy to like school more, engage and feel positive about himself learning again. A 10yo girl building new skills around friendships and managing ‘bad behaviour’ at school. Working with a 12 yo boy who is co-parented, work through feelings of anger, sadness and dealing with his emotions in a more effective way.
Typical sessions include friendships, listening/communicating better, school problems, family relationships, managing behaviour and emotions.
Coached kids keep a take home diary so you can easily see what we get up to in session.
Plus, You have a Parent Session with me first so you can fill me in on your story and what you would like to achieve before Kids Coaching begins.
You the Parent also benefit from new tools and skills to enhance your parenting on the problem you would like solved.
Today… pondering me…
This week I have been pondering me and my own journey.
Lately, I have been turning inward to reflect on my own feelings and state.
And what did I find? A big surprise. Like I didn’t know it was there.
Not to the extent I now realised. That is why periods of self reflection are vital.
You see… for many years in my own life… one of the reasons I became passionate about helping people get happy, is because these are the kinds of words I would have used to describe the places I lived inside of me… Restless. Lost. Lonely. Stale. Jealous. Bitter. Sad. Dark. Confused. Now from the outside I looked ‘happy enough‘ like the rest of you,
but on the inside, when alone, I felt different and sad. I didn’t ‘get’ life.
All of this affected my ability to have quality connections and enjoy life. Lucky me – I knew there was more and I just had to go find it.
And so my search begun…
Now today, I find inside of me, authentic beautiful words that describe the real me… Connected. Settled. Content. Happy. Blessed. Alive. Breathing. Feeling. Whole. Balanced. Passionate. In love. Grown up. Wise. Teaching. Learning. Growing. Shining.
All of this ensures I can connect, breathe, feel and enjoy life.
Now on the outside I look ‘happy enough‘ like the rest of you,
and on the inside, I feel alive, connected and happy. I have come a long way. I have done so much.
I am proud of me.
Personal and spiritual journeys to heal and find me.
And the view from here is awesome.
That is why I know happy is for everyone.
And we all have the choice to live happy from the inside out.
That is the human journey we are all on.
No one is any different from me and you.
We are not meant to do it alone.
If you work, friendships, marriage and the like are not great – the starting point is you.
Are you ready?
Happy Hearts and Healthy Minds
Here is my take on staying well.
You only have to turn on the news or open the paper these days to hear something about depression and mental health.
Last week on the news another story of a known identity speaking up about ‘depression’. He said, ‘I didn’t know I had depression, I was just suffering deep sadness because of big changes in my life, feeling lost and not knowing what to do with myself’.
And again on the news recently the newsreader says ‘and we now have the highest number of children diagnosed with depression, more so than ever before’.
Today when we suffer, feel lost, angry, very sad for prolonged times, people notice, we isolate ourselves because we think we are broken, we suffer more, off we go to the Drs and we often get labeled and offered medication. The quick fix.
When a driver who fell asleep at the wheel killed my Dad in his prime, suddenly, I too fell into a prolonged vortex of grief and darkness. People noticed I wasn’t right. I was labeled with ‘mild depression brought on my prolonged grief’. I felt like they wanted me to ‘move on now’. My grief took a lot of unraveling and painful layer shedding because it was also my life story, growing up and the chance to really find me. That process took me five years. More than just my grief.
I ‘reluctantly’ took antidepressants for 6 months, and part of me felt like a failure.
So to offset this I set on a path to get real about life and authentically heal me.
I read, listened, got support, talked, healed, learnt and grew up.
That is a big part of my WHY I am My Coach Wendy.
Because I get your stuff. My heart has been there too. Broken, ran over and hurt.
So the moral of this story is – I am just like you. Hit by the bus of life.
I believe that anxiety and depression are caused by our unhealed stories and blocked emotional pains. You can do something about it you know.
Put yourself in charge of that. You are responsible for you.
Our human journey is to find ourselves, our place and live purposefully with meaning. My WHY is to spread joy, love and lift others to higher places within themselves. That is what I stand for. My philosophy.
Find your happy place. It is waiting there right inside of you.
Depression and anxiety are caused by great feelings of overwhelmed, anger and sadness. From events such as lack of love, care and attention, painful events, death, lost of job, marriage breakdown and other human struggles. We all endure these. It is the action you take and the decisions you make that count in the long run.\ So rather than feeling like you are the only one suffering, reach out, tell someone and go get support. Don’t sit around suffering prolonged feelings that can manifest into a larger sickness. The longer you wait, the harder it is.
Now as for kids and growing depression rates – this just means your child is really struggling to work through everyday challenges, or they too are suffering from their stories and emotional pain. The common things I see kids for is dealing with school struggles, friendship and bullying complications, family breakdowns, death in the family and so on. You see – they just need extra tools and support to get through everyday problems too.
Mental health is not some growing ‘disease’, its just our human response to struggles and everyday trauma. Connecting yourself and sharing is the way to heal.
Even just speaking up to your own friends and family, opening up, connecting and sharing your pains is healing and normalises that you too are suffering. We all suffer. Talk about and share your pain. Heals us. Life is a series of sufferings. It how you respond that matters. Don’t gloss over the hard stuff. Go there to share it. Challenges come our way offering golden opportunities to find who we really are, and help us to make meaning of this thing called life.If no one else is around for you ~ reach out to me ~ that is WHY I am here.
NLP and mBraining. What the heck!
What is NLP? Neuro Linguistic Programming What is mBIT? Using all of my brains! What?
Well let me explain.
And, I want you to know WHY its awesome and YOU want it in your life. Neuro – The study of the mind, nervous system – how we think. Linguistic – The study of words and how we use language. Programming – The habits and patterns of behaviour. mBraining – our innate ability to use our multiple intelligences.
These are just some of the modalities I use in my coaching practice one on one when you come and visit me.
We have six senses. Seeing. Hearing. Feeling. Smelling. Tasting.
And our ‘sixth sense’. Intuition. Feeling connected to and using our whole being.
The more of these we involved at once to make change – the more profound, rapid and lasting your positive change is.
You want to take ‘making change’ beyond being a nice idea.
You want it to be something you can have and access.
You see we all actually do want positive change, we are just worried about
‘HOW that is going to happen and be real for me?’.
The HOW I use in NLP and mBIT coaching practices.
These involve all of your senses.
Its getting all of you – conscious and unconscious involved and onboard.
So don’t worry about the HOW. That is my job. I got you.
YOU just worry about the WHAT it is that you really want.
And leave the rest to me.
Write down your Wish List for change.
Bring it on in.
Lets get you moving SunShine.
What really drives you?
Ever heard someone say ‘I have it all and yet something is still missing‘.
Something doesn’t seem quite right.
You might even feel this yourself in your life right now.
Seem to have reached milestones.
Have the material things like the house and flashy car.
Ticked the boxes of a good job and married with kids.
But… something…is…still… missing? What drives you? You have to find this and be connected to it.
What gets your excited?
What do you really enjoy doing?
What feeling to you chase?
Do you like to feel important and want recognition?
Do you like to feel connected and contributing?
Are you driven for the wrong or right reasons?
What is it that you are really chasing.
You want to know this… otherwise life might just fly on past and you wonder if what you were doing really mattered.
What can you learn about human behaviour by observing those around you?
What kind of impact did your parents have on you?
How did you want things to be different?
And so, what drives you?
Why do you do what you do?
What do you believe about life and yourself?
What do you strive for?
Is it about you, or someone else?
Have you already ‘reached the top’ and wonder why the view is crappy?
Have you gone to beautiful places and cant feel it? Void of feeling magic?
Do you toss and turn with worry or do you sleep peacefully next to the one you love.
Do your kids really know who you are and hold your hand on long walks?
Are you willing to do whatever it takes to make the change you want?
If you are not sure… this weekend go climb the nearest hill top and reflect for a moment on two things 1) How much am I able to really enjoy this moment and 2) If I had 12 months to live what would I change about my life.
Its all YOUr fault!
As little as 1% and as much as 99%
is all your fault. Can you handle that?
This week I want you to watch how much you immediately jump to place the blame on someone else. Interesting hey…
We think ‘its all your fault’.
When instead ask yourself the most important question of all… ‘How much of this is my fault’. I want you to own up to yourself on your percentage of the issue.
Forget the other party for now.
This is all about you.
Just you. And your bit.
Now it might be 5%. Maybe 25% It might be 75%. Maybe 95%.
You honestly assess and choose your portion.
Next… only focus on that bit, and ask yourself. ‘What is my honest assessment on my percentage’?
‘What do I need to do with my part to be okay with this overall and satisfied that I have behaved well?’
‘What do I need to do to make by bit right’? Make this your internal and personal inquiry.
Or even write it out on paper to make it clearer to see.
You do this because it releases you from the problem.
You become responsible for your part and YOU deal with that part honestly, fairly and according to your own values, beliefs and standards of acceptable behaviour.
Leave the other person to deal with their part.
Whether they do to your level of satisfaction is not within your control.
You cannot make anyone else do anything by shaming, blaming or demanding it.
If you keep pursuing that path you may be left hurt, angry, unhappy, unsatisfied or maybe bitter and resentful. YOU want to deal with it, and move on.
Just your part remember, even if it is only 5%. Deal with that part.
You can lead another person to make the right call by first leading by example.
In life you are in-charge of only one person fully – Y O U.
So… this is your task for the rest of the week.
Make a personal inquiry and own up to your part. Be responsible for Y O U. And see what happens for you next.
I know in any issue, when I deal with my part, its done and I can move on. PS: You might have just learnt a secret to deal with difficult people, handling conflict and releasing yourself from negativity! PSS: The reason why we experience conflict is because you are trying to police someone elses bad behaviour. What a killjoy. And so remember – we can’t control others. We can only control ourselves.
Amplifying your child
Each of us comes with our own gifts to the world.
It is our job as the parent to begin to point them out to our children.
This helps our child to find their own place and meaning.
Otherwise they can grow up thinking they somehow ‘don’t fit in’.
This begins at school.
When your child comes home and tells you ‘I cant do it’.
And so begins the comparison that ‘some can and some cant’.
That is always going to be the case.
Some are good at numbers.
Some are good at words.
Some are good at being wild and creative.
Some at good at being still and methodical.
Our job is to get our children know – however they are – its just perfect.
And that school is the place we get exposed to everything there is on offer.
Then later in life we get to choose for ourselves what we want to pursue.
Not everyone has to be great at numbers, or words, or science or music.
School is one of the avenues we take to help us find what we are good at.
It is not who we are. That’s a big difference.
What matters MORE is that your child finds their own place.
I don’t want my kids to fit into some kind of boxed system. I want them to find their own way. Create the new.
So take a fresh look – what is it that my child is naturally gifted in? Where can I see they already have talent? How can I help them to amplify this, so it may grow?
How can I help my child to shine and master their unique set of gifts? Some kids who come to see me say they are ‘dumb’.
What I ask instead is ‘what brings you lots of joy or get you super excited’?
We look for all the little pieces and soon they see they are ‘great’ at lots of things.
And I say something like ‘now this doesn’t mean you don’t have to keep on trying at the numbers, thing – you know you need some of that too – and know that your brain and all of you is magic at the things its naturally meant to be’. When your child leaves school you want them to be super excited and ready for the world. Not so beaten up they don’t know what is left or where they fit.
You can do this now by looking for your childs inner gifts such as, do they like numbers, words or science. Do they love acting, singing and creating. Is your child a planner, organised, disciplined and responsible. Is your child carefree, a dreamer, reflective and thoughtful.
Everyone has their place.
Forge your own path. Make your own fireworks.
Let your child know, ‘the world needs you. We are ready and waiting to see all of you’. I support you and your family to turn around any set backs and bring joyfulness back into learning. I also support children to find, amplify their talents, skill and confidence building.
MY simple steps of stillness
Stillness and quiet time are an essential part of our everyday. Me included.
It is taking a little time out.
Creating a little space.
It is giving your head brain a rest.
It is connecting to ourselves again.
Feeling, and breathing life into our whole body and soul.
So here are some of the simple steps I usually take in any given week. My life.
Water my garden and pull a few weeds.
I feed and chat with my chickens. I love them. I give the little babies a kiss on their fluffy heads.
I pick parsley, spinach and other green goodies from my garden. Its winter!
I cuddle and chat with my dogs. Pull out the prickles and look for fleas!
I go to Yoga and get all Zen. Stretch and breathe deeply.
I read a book in the warm sunshine.
I feed and chat with my Guinea Pigs. I give the little babies a kiss on their cute heads.
I walk in the bush. I love nature!
I bake a yummy cake. Or two! I go fishing and float around at sea with my family.
I have a real coffee on my verandah.
Watch birds fly past and clouds forming.
I star gaze and ocean watch.
So you can see… they are all easy.
It is all the simple good old-fashioned stuff.
The little things that made a big difference. I reconnect to me. Thats the whole point.
Not having to DO anything. It is just space to BE. I feel my whole body come alive. My thinking heads stops. PS: Stillness time means no technology! It is quiet time. What do you like to do?
This week, do one activity of stillness everyday.
And take notice of how much calmer and connected you feel.
Model this to your children and others around you. A balanced life. Lead by example. xW
How to embrace even your ‘bad’ traits
Something might be said to you that makes you feel bad or ashamed of yourself. ‘You are so bossy and overpowering’.
You might feel like something is wrong with you. ‘You are so negative and critical’.
You feel you are broken and need fixing. ‘You are so shy and immature’.
You feel like you are not normal and you need to change. What a load of rubbish!
What you need to do instead is learn how to flip these perceived negatives into a celebrated positive.
Let me give you some examples;
If you have been called ‘controlling and manipulative‘ means you are also influential and powerful.
Ever been called ‘complicated and difficult‘ means you too are extravagant and elegant. Stingy and cheap means you are frugal and thrifty.
If you are ‘opinionated’ you too can celebrate you are decisive.
If you are ‘negative’ you can celebrate you might very well be sensible and realistic.
Are you blunt and rude or direct and honest.
Are you chaotic and disorganised or just creative and innovative.
Been blamed for being quick tempered and angry means you know you are enthusiastic and passionate.
Shy and quiet means you are reflective and thoughtful.
Been called ‘too emotional’ before, means you really must be sensitive and caring.
Are you impatient and impulsive means you are spontaneous and instinctive.
NOW you can’t tell me there is not some real inner goodness there to be CELEBRATED.
I am trained in uncovering your freaking unique qualities so that you too can celebrate all of you.
There are no broken bits, they just need to be used in the right way. A practical example the other day I had a client tell me he has been told he is ‘too direct’ and ‘overpowering’. So instead of accepting this broad sweeping statement as a negative I asked him specifically how are you too direct and overpowering – and he gave me the examples. We also checked where is ‘overpowering and direct’ useful and how to use this more in the positive. Then we check the ways he is using it not so well yet and make little tweeks such as adding touch and tenderness, lowering his large stature during intense conversations and standing shoulder to shoulder with his sons.So instead of buying into the larger negative belief that ‘overpowering and direct’ is not okay, with a deeper enquiry he has learnt how to use it better and celebrate its positive useful qualities. Do you want to learn more about who you really are?
Releasing Negative Energy
When we hold onto something, we are holding onto negative or stale energies.
That takes up space inside of our being that prevents us from being present.
Negative energy blocks joy and our ability to enjoy quiet time.
You will have experienced this with the simple example of when you release something you let out a large exhale and often say ‘oh that feels so much better now’.
Let me give you an example: A woman holding onto her painful story of grief and a shamed relationship.
Its been weighing her down. She feels so sad, heavy and tired.
She has lost her lusciousness and energy for life.
She shared her story with me…
Its painful and long.
There is a massive release of negative pent up energy.
She cry and exhales.
What she then unexpectly experienced was a feeling of ‘so much more space and peace inside’.
We continue our work together towards healing and happiness.
She comes back to life. A boy feels sick with the story is is carrying about being dishonest and lying.
He says ‘I can’t take it anymore, I have to get it out of me’. He shares his long story full or worry and shame.
He learns powerful lessons for life. We build on this.
He crys and begins to lengthen his breaths.
Negative energy is releasing creating space for calm.
Now I know you already innately know this.
So this is just a friendly reminder.
What are you holding onto that you need to release?
Releasing the story releasing stale negative stuck emotions.
This process creates space inside of you for positive calm.
Releasing old painful worries releases the need for anxiety and depression.
Our nervous systems can settle and find balance once again. The straight fact of the matter is – you are blocking your ability to be happy when you are holding onto stuck shit you don’t need. Go there.
Do what you instinctively know needs to be done. I am here if you can’t do it on your own. Its not hard and messy like you may imagine.
It will however set you free.
Together, we have got this.
Death and the Bereaved
I often hear the words ‘I didn’t go because I didn’t know what to say’. ‘I didn’t ring because I was afraid I would say the wrong thing’.
I can tell you ~ in death ~ words don’t matter.
What matters more is your loving kindness and presence.
This is not about you.
It is about showing up and showing you care.
That is all that is needed.
When we are lost to the now in grief we just need people to show up.
And show up over a long period.
It is never too late. 1 year. 2 years. 5 years.
Not just the first week, or month.
Show you care over a long period.
Don’t be scared you will say the wrong thing.
Mention their name.
Speak of the dead.
Talk about the story.
It is not a taboo or scary subject.
Be brave enough to go there.
And one day when it is about you; you will be glad that people show up, ask questions, hold your hand, sit together, laugh and cry.
In death, we just need one another more than ever.
Go there now.
Who around you is suffering?
Make the call.
This means more than anything.
More than staying away.
You are needed.
Energy Drive Passion
Do you feel alive? Or stale and bored… Do you boing out of bed excited? Or lazy and tired… Do you love what you are doing? Or its a means to an end… Do you feel connected to yourself and those around you? Or lonely and sad… Are you happy and connected with your lover? Do are you living like house mates…
Us humans need to find meaning.
We need to make sense of the world around us.
We must be connected to our passion and purpose to feel alive.
Otherwise we can feel we are living some kind of empty existence.
So we have soon much choice.
What are Y O U going to do with all of that power?
Did you know you even have it?
The right time is N O W to examine your life.
Making simple easy changes can change your life. It can be that simple. Coaching delivers thechange you struggle to make happen on your own.
I can professionally guide you to make positive change.
a G R E A T place to begin is assessing how you are spending your time, what you want to do less of, more off and identifying places of change.
N E X T lets look at does your life have meaning, are you doing what you are meant to, do you feel excited and purposeful?
Welcome back to Term 3 lovely people.
What else would you like to work on? Positive change is easy when you have a fire in your belly to do so.
Is it Y O U R time yet?
ALIVE or dead?
When we are disconnected from our passion we can feel dead and stale.
When we are disconnected from our purpose we lose energy and drive.
So that might answer your question around ‘why don’t I have any energy in the mornings to get out of bed?’.
Or… ‘’Why do I suffer from lack of enthusiasm for life?’ Or… you might feel an undercurrent that something in your life is wrong or missing?
So lets take a look at the authentic way to bring you back to life… What lights you up? What makes your heart sing? What do you love to do? What is your creative expression to the world?
How are you spending your time?
So you have to find your inner purpose first.
Next, you bring this to life by doing this with your hands. Bring your passions to life.
You see, for us humans to feel alive, we have to make meaning.
We have to feel like we are making a difference. Otherwise what is this life all about?
If you are lacking zest and energy, I suggest taking a fresh look at your life.
The how and why you are doing things the way you are doing.
Bring yourself back to life. That is what happens around here regularly!
This gives your whole system a reason to get excited and bounce out of bed in the mornings.
Making Logic Real
We often get a sense of the truth.
Our own innate truth.
In my room here we go over the logic.
A client will say ‘yeah I know that, I have heard it before, but HOW do I make it real in me how do I take it from words into ACTION?’ Maybe frustrated that you can’t make it real?
Take it beyond words? B I N G O.
This is the key distinction in the work I do.
I make the theory real.
Turning words into action. HOW?
Though using internal coaching practices like Neuro Linguistic Programming, Time Line Therapy, Multiple Brain Intelligences mBIT, Conversational Hypnosis and much more.
These are the tools and strategies I am trained in to make your words, dream and desires real.
Those who are into personal development, growth, learning improving ourselves or our lives will say ‘I get it, and I want to take it beyond that…”.
So we must bring in internal integration techniques that make the changes REAL inside of us.
What that looks like in action is walking around my room travelling your time line, a closed eye guided process or moving around locations in my office.
Sometimes its a ‘bit weird‘ but more often ‘was amazing‘.
And so everyone who does this, experiences REAL amazing change.
That is what you are here for.
So if you want to take positive change beyond the books you have read, CDs, seminars you have attended and people you have talked to come and lets make it real life change inside of you. Personal Life Coaching. GO}}}
Hey you, yes Y O U…
You might hear a coach like me saying you can ‘reach your full potential’.
What does that really mean?
And if you already have everything you need inside of you, how do you access that!!
Well that is some of the coaching that I do…
You wont necessarily be learning something ‘outside’ on a whiteboard.
What you will be discovering or reconnecting to is something on the inside.
A internal awaking to your full potential…
Sometimes we might feel like inside, something is ‘missing’… this is our personal journey as human beings to stop the search on the outside and begin to turn inward.
The cycle of finding out who we are, our place in the world, why we are here, how we express our awesomeness, make sense, live happily, and leave the world better than we found it.
This goes the same for anything… life, work, family and leading others.
Which is what you do.
How do we lead others?
Be the person they are drawn to follow.
This has to be authentic.
We simply cant make that shit up.
People can tell.
We feel it. I feel you. You feel me.
So… developing ourselves from the inside out is what counts.
(Well thats how I see it).
That is the not so new now, game changer, for people just like me and you.
I do this work one-on-one. As its kinda personal. And cool personal stuff happens.
I do a range of things. Personal, workplace greatness, family and relationships.
As you can imagine, one-on-one, you go further faster.
I will take you through a guided internal process to explore yourself – and the taste to awakening to your full potential.
Any questions please ask.
Oh and please have a look around my website, more there about who I am and what I do.
You can follow me on FB and Instagram.
Kids love rituals (and so do we)
I love rituals. We have many. Its not a cult religious thing. Maybe its spiritual. Rituals have the power to change us. You can have personal rituals and family rituals. Rituals for work to prepare yourself for an event.
Rituals to start you day, before a meal or to drift off to sleep at night.
A ritual is a pattern, song, practice you create.
Regularly performed in a set manner.
Rituals strengthen family bonds. Help during times of stress.
Encourage communication and develop rhythm.
What are the rituals in your life?
Getting ready for work.
Your morning coffee thing.
Winding down at night for sleep time.
What rituals could you create?
Lighting a candle for dinner.
Singing a this is how we brush our teeth song.
Giving thanks for your day or saying a prayer.
Ten minutes of morning yoga or a bedtime mediation.
Singing a pack away tidy up song with your kids.
Kissing your loved one in a certain way, just for them.
Kids love routine and rhythm.
Rituals make it possible.
This is one of the practical tools I will teach you and chat about more in parent coaching.
Oh and this works great for dads who are away from home either working long hours or FIFO. Creating rituals your kids can count on that create more stability in the family home.
It is okay to break
Now let me explain…
When things are not great, we hold on.
We hold on to what we know.
It’s the human condition of habit.
Even though it might not be obviously working.
We hold on tight.
Because we are scared if we break all hell will break loose.
Our heart aches for change.
Our head frets and worries.
Our heart feels tight and restricted.
Our tummies churn and try to send up little signals crying for help.
Our head holds on. ‘It’s the way its been done’.
So… when all this internal warring gets too crazy. Too much.
This is different for everyone.
We call this crisis. Some kind of melt down.
We hit rock bottom.
We feel broken.
Now what… … …
Sometimes we have to break to find something new. When we break ~ a huge amount of negative energy is dispelled from our overloaded nervous system. We can finally let go… this creates NEW magical space for newness.
Especially if you are good at holding on and keeping it all together’.
Are you worn out yet?
I have been broken before.
It was the best thing that ever happened to me.
Because I recreated myself into something new.
I was so full, my breaking created space for something besides the shit I was holding onto.
I didn’t get this until I broke.
Sometimes, we need to break to find the new. www.mycoachwendy.com.au Personal Life Coach
What fits your needs right now?